Imagine Me & You
by recreativity
Summary: What if Faberry met again in NYC, but Rachel was married to Finn? Based on the movie Imagine Me & You.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: I'm obsessed with this movie since this week and had to do this. This is pt 1 of 2. Some parts are litteral, some not. Enjoy, review!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

Rachel knew it was stupid, having a staring match with her alarm clock, but when it rang, it meant the day had officially begun. One of the most important days of her life. Her eyes followed the sweep hand with meticulous precision, counting down the seconds until it hits the 12. It was 8 AM. Despite the fact that Rachel had been doing nothing but counting down to this moment – all night, all week, every minute, actually, for the last six months of their engagement – she still starts when it rings, breaking her focus.

The biggest Berriest smile she feels like she has ever smiled spread across her face, and she hugged a pillow to her body as she started giggling, then laughing. Sometimes, you just know. Rachel just _knew _that today was going to be the best day of her life.

The doorbell rang and she sprinted towards it, bouncing up and down a few times to get herself under control before opening it and seeing Mercedes and Tina. She enveloped Mercedes in a big hug and saw that Tina looks like she's about to cry already.

"You're getting married today!" Tina says in a high voice.

"I know!" Rachel squeaks in return. The mad giggles were starting now, and probably not stopping for another few hours.

Finn is far from Rachel's mind right now. Yes, she is marrying him today and couldn't be happier, but part of her feels like it's _her _day today. Okay, a really big part of her feels like that. It's strengthened by the fact that, although it took so long for Glee club to accept her and for so long she had felt like she'd had no true friends, and yet they were all here for her today. Well, for them. But that was, like, the same thing, right?

She and Finn were living in New York, just like Kurt and Blaine. They were Finn's best men, along with Puck, who had been in New York for an internship. But all of Lima had flown over to New York to be there for her big day. Everyone was there. Her fathers would undoubtedly swing by within an hour – Leroy crying like a baby – and she knew the after-party could only promise to be big and to be epic, since it was partly planned by Santana.

The ceremony was set to take place in Rachel's favorite part of New York, Central Park. She looked out the window as the familiar streets raced past her. She was in the limo with her dads, Tina and Mercedes and she can't help but feel _awesome_. She did it. She found the one boy to spend the rest of her life with, and the rest of her life would be starting today.

The only person, Rachel thought while chewing on the corner of her lip, who _wasn't _there is the one person who she could really stand missing. Quinn wasn't coming. Rachel doubted if she would have invited her if she'd known where Quinn was living, because her feelings had changed after leaving High School. She knew now, that sometimes there is something like _too _forgiving. Quinn had hurt her a lot. And also, she couldn't help but feel like Quinn was the only person in the world who could take Finn away from her.

But Quinn had disappeared off the face of the earth after High School. They day after graduation, Quinn was spotted by Burt Hummel in the early morning, throwing a large bag into the trunk of her car and driving away. Nobody knew what had happened to her.

No, she would definitely not be missed today. Why is she thinking about this on her wedding day again?

"Are you nervous, baby girl?" Mercedes asks her.

"No, of course not," Rachel says, and fixes the smile on her face again. "Just excited."

Little did she know that Quinn had _just_ been found by her old classmates after 4 years. At Rachel's wedding.

"That's right, still got the guns," Puck says, flexing his arms and looking down with a grin.

"Shut up, Puckerman," a blonde woman with relatively short cut hair replied, fixing the pink rose in his jacket.

"Finnie," Puck's sister, Hannah – who usually goes by H - addresses the nervous-looking groom, "Why is the alphabet in that order?"

Finn doesn't hear her, trying to fix his jacket right again.

"But I've grown up," Puck says. "I'm more in touch with my feelings now too. Just like you're not the same Quinn from High School anymore, either."

She looks up at him and sees the cocky grin stretched across his face. In High School, they hadn't tried again after Beth happened. Puck was in love with her back then, and had to get over it because she didn't love him back. Now, that and the whole Beth-thing seemed to be far enough behind them for him to flirt with Quinn again. And in that way, he definitely _hadn't _changed.

_God, _she thought, _I thought I'd escaped this mess years ago. Why did I have to take this job again? What are the odds anyway? Of all the florists in all the world..._

"I told you, it's Lucy now."

"Why did you change your name?"

"It's my actual name. I didn't really change it, I changed it back."

He almost looks serious, but then says: "I'm still calling you Quinn, if that's alright."

"It's not."

"I go by Noah now too, but you can still call me Puck."

"I don't think I should call you anything."

"Puck is a better name for screaming out in bed. You should try it."

"Finnie!" H said.

Finn looks down, because the only person who is allowed to call him Finnie is Puck's little sister, so he already knows who's calling him.

"What is it, H?" He replies to the 11-year old.

"What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?"

Quinn arches a blonde eyebrow, pretty damn curious as of how _Finn Hudson _is going to answer this question.

"I…" he starts, before pausing, frowning, and saying: "Honestly, I have no idea."

Quinn rolls her eyes. God, had _nobody _changed but her in the last 4 years?

Puck's mother seemed to think that this is an appropriate time to usher the girl away from the stressed out groom, but Quinn stood in her way. Someone had got to give the girl a real answer, right? It's just a stupid, obvious trick question.

Puck's mother stopped, taken aback by the appearance of a girl who is so familiar yet so unfamiliar at the same time. Quinn met her gaze for a split-second, and chose to focus her attention on Hannah instead. She probably didn't remember Quinn very well, and Quinn was thankful for that.

"It never happens. If there's a thing that can't be stopped, it's not possible for there to be something else which can't be moved, and vice versa. They can't both exist. It's a trick question."

She risked another look at Mrs. Puckerman. "That is the answer."

After a short silence, Mrs. Puckerman continues rushing Hannah away, but not before she has the chance to ask: "Can she sit with me?"

A little while later – after a bathroom break that was preceded by a _long _wait that was to be blamed on an overload of complex dresses - Quinn allowed herself to be dragged inside by H, and immediately regretted it.

Yes, indeed, everyone was there. Everyone she'd been avoiding the last 4 years. So many pieces of the puzzle that formed her history, the puzzle she'd thought she'd torn apart, ripped the box in which it came, set the whole thing on fire and then set the ashes on fire again.

Mr. Shuester was sitting 3 rows over with Ms. Pillsbury. Artie was sitting in his wheel chair in the front row. He had a goatee, but looked pretty much the same apart from that. God, even Santana and Brittany were there, linking pinkies still. Mike and Sam were sitting beside Artie, and she was staring at them until H sighed deeply.

"Doesn't Finn look handsome?"

She didn't reply, but watched as 2 of her ex-boyfriends seemed to have an animated conversation. Little did she know that it was about her.

"I can't believe Quinn's here," Puck said. "You know how I felt about her. Figure she wants to get back together with me? I'm pretty sure she does. She always did have a thing for me."

"Yeah, yeah, sure," Finn said, looking around to see if he could find his bride.

"I mean, I got definite vibes that she wanted to hook up. She was totally flirting with me. It took her so long to fix that flower to my jacket. Do you think it was because she was nervous and her hands were like, shaking, or because she couldn't take her hands of the Puckasaurus' chest?"

"Dude, it's my wedding day. Can we talk about me?"

"Sure," Puck said, and fell silent. "Did you get vibes that she wanted a taste of—"

"Puck, you're my best friend, but seriously, shut up now, okay?"

"Sorry, dude. You nervous or something?"

Finn didn't reply as he stared down the aisle, trying to will the time to go by faster. He just needed to see it, to see her, he just wanted to get it over with now.

"She'll show," Puck said in a little bit of a softer voice. Finn threw him an uncertain look.

"Yeah, I know. She'll come, right? Of course she will. Yeah," he reassured himself.

Quinn was having a panic attack.

It was too much. Too many familiar faces. She didn't even want anyone to know she was living in New York, and here was _everyone_. God, what if they told her parents? What if they tried to get in contact with her again? She really didn't want it.

But the worst part of all, was… that she was at _Rachel's_wedding. There was a good chance that Shelby was around, and if Shelby was, _she _was too. Quinn was so scared that she didn't even feel guilty when she was silently praying that Rachel had never fixed things with her mother.

She rose in one fluent motion, and said to H: "I really have to go now. Set up… things, for the reception."

The bridal march started playing and everyone stood up.

_This is wrong. I shouldn't be here, at Rachel Berry's wedding._

After ruining so many normal days, she couldn't help but feel like even just showing up was ruining Rachel's big day, and she _really _didn't want to do that.

She walked out of her row as fast as she could and made her way to the outside. She was walking the opposite of what Rachel was walking, and she was walking at a much faster pace.

Still, when she passed Rachel and a small man with glasses that she recognized as the person to hire her to do the flowers, she couldn't help but pause and stare. Not at Tina. Not even at Mercedes, one of the people she missed most from her old life. Only at the woman in today's leading role.

She hadn't seen Rachel in so long, not since _before_, since before she'd started getting reacquainted with herself, or maybe for the first time. Not since before she'd changed so much. She felt like a different person, and was looking at the world from a different angle. Right now, she was looking at Rachel from a different angle. Or maybe she was just looking at Rachel, because she felt like she'd never looked at Rachel before.

Because otherwise, how could she not have known Rachel Berry was _beautiful_?

Rachel couldn't help but feel a little nervous. Almost like performance anxiety, despite the fact that she hadn't gotten performance anxiety since she was 4 years old. When her daddy took her arm and guided her down the aisle, she felt happy, delirious, victorious, but also like her stomach was in knots.

For some reason, a reason she'd never know, something inside her moved her to look to the left. Her eyes connected with an eerily familiar pair, and for a split second, the knot in her stomach tightened. She looked away and her small smile faded when she realized who she thought she'd seen, before looking again. Had she just imagined Quinn there, after thinking about her earlier that day?

There, at the end, was Finn. She tried to keep her mind in the moment, maybe the most memorable of her life, but she found that she couldn't. Had it been Quinn? Was she really here? What was she doing? Was she there for Puck, or worse, Finn? Did she want to apologize to Rachel? Was she there to see everyone from Lima again? Had she left already? Why was she thinking about this on her wedding day?

Maybe Quinn was still here. Maybe if she'd turn around…

Rachel started to move her head, to throw a look behind her.

"You look beautiful," Finn said with a small smile.

She moved her head so quickly that it almost gave her a whiplash, looking up at him and she smiled, trying to ignore the pang of guilt in her stomach. Had she turned, she would have seen Quinn lingering in the doorway, casting a long last look at the couple before turning around and jogging away.

About 2 hours later, Quinn had decided that she was an adult, goddammit, and she was going to act like one. Facing up to your past is a part of life? Life was Quinn's bitch. She'd do it, and do it well. She wasn't just going to the reception, no, she was going to talk to Rachel. She was going to pull her shit together and apologize. She was going to be Quinn fucking Fabray, even though she hadn't been Quinn fucking Fabray in 4 years. Maybe she needed a little bit of her old badass self to get her through today.

Well, to get her through today, she'd probably need 3 beers for starters, but she wasn't drinking anywhere near people from Lima. Way too many things that could go wrong with that plan.

She spotted a small figure in a huge, poofy white dress with pink roses in her hair bending over the punch and swallowed. Her stomach lurched with nerves, add to that that she had yet to come to terms with the realization that Rachel Berry was _beautiful_, and Quinn knew that she had to get some of the punch. She just hoped it had enough alcohol in it to give her liquid courage, but not enough to get her lightweight body drunk.

Her steps weren't slow, weren't hesitant, no. It was a stomp that the red sea would have parted for. It was the walk of Quinn fucking Fabray. She was Quinn fucking Fabray. Until she was standing in front of Rachel freaking Berry.

"Hi," she said, feeling like her guts had fallen out of her stomach.

Rachel yelped and turned around immediately.

"Hi," Rachel replied, forcing a smile on her face. "I thought it was you earlier. What are you doing here?"

Nobody could ever _not _accuse Rachel of being abrasive.

"I did your flowers."

Rachel stayed silent for a long second, a surprised expression frozen on her face.

"You did? _You _did my flowers?"

Quinn nodded, and Rachel smiled, more genuinely this time.

"I like my flowers."

"Thank you," Quinn replied, even though she thought it sounded a little strange for a compliment to _her_.

"But daddy said he got them from Lucy's Flowered Up," Rachel replied.

Quinn took a deep breath. One thing about Rachel she'd forgotten was that she never could figure things out for herself in silence, no, _everything _needed to be said. She was quickly getting over the beauty. It was probably 99% make-up anyway.

"And I am Lucy."

She waited, she waited, until it got through to Rachel.

"Oh, my! I must admit that I had completely forgotten about that particular part of your past. It does, however, make a lot of sense now that I remember the Lucy Caboosey debacle."

Rachel immediately looks like she regrets speaking the hated nickname, but Quinn just smiled lightly in response. _Definitely going for the punch_.

"Yeah. So, I went back to being Lucy, and Lucy's Flowered Up is my shop," she replied, making a move for the absolutely distasteful looking punch behind Rachel. The woman blocked her.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," she replied with a mysterious nervous smile.

"Why not?" Quinn said, trying to keep the irritation in her voice to a minimum.

"I am under the impression that Artie spiked it."

"Even better," and Quinn made a move to get past Rachel, only to get blocked again.

"Berry!"

"It's Mrs. Hudson now, if you do feel the undeniable need to call me by my last name."

Quinn glared.

"Could you please get out of my way, Berry?"

Rachel bit her lip, looking up at Quinn through long eyelashes.

"What the hell is going on?"

Rachel took a deep breath.

"My ring."

"Your… your ring?"

"My wedding ring. I was trying to get some punch and it… it just fell in!"

She turned around, stirring the punch. "My wedding ring is now in there…"

"And you're here fishing for it," Quinn said. "And you can't empty it? No you can't, right?" she answered her own question. She looked at her outfit – jeans, t-shirt, jacket – and decided that she did kind of owe Rachel Berry-Hudson.

"Cover me with your dress, I'm going in."

She hadn't been in for 10 seconds or Rachel was talking to a man, who sounded like an absolute douchebag and introduced himself as Finn's boss.

"You are exactly as he described," Rachel said with a tight-lipped smile.

"Bingo," Quinn muttered underneath her breath, clutching the cold, hard ring. She slipped it with her punch-drenched hand on Rachel's soft, squeaky clean hand, before moving over to surprise this douchebag.

"Oh, hello," he said, giving her a once-over.

"This is – this is Lucy. She did our flowers."

"My name is Rob, but you can call me anything you like."

Quinn grabbed his stretched-out hand with her punch-drenched one. "And I'm sure I will," she replied, smiling at Rachel.

Quinn was dancing with H, and it surprised her that she was actually having a good time. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that not that many people had spotted her yet, so she was saved the trouble of talking with everyone. Though she had a horrible feeling that Puck still had something up his sleeve.

He came to stand behind her and H, and said to his little sister: "Hey, mom needs your help with something."

"Okay!" The girl replied enthusiastically, and just like that Quinn was left alone with Puck. Of course, the music had to change to a slow-dance then.

"Oh wow," Puck said. "What a coincidence. May I have this dance?"

Quinn slipped inside his arms. _God, guys are _huge_. I forgot how impractical it really is._

"We still fit nicely together, don't you think?" He whispered in her ear. "Are you alright?"

"You don't have to squash me," she said, trying to keep her voice light and playful.

"Hmm, I always did like holding you like this. Do you think-"

"Is this thing on?" Someone said, tapping the mic. Puck loosened his hold on her.

"Oh no," he said. "Leroy Berry is drunk and about to make a speech."

"So, what I just wanted… wait, _is _this thing on?"

Hiram Berry – Quinn discovered his name later – made his way to the pair of them and cut in.

"What are you still doing here?" he said in an urgent whisper to Puck. "Go, go! Save him! Make a real speech!"

Puck was gone from her within a second, and before she knew it, he was politely ushering Leroy away from the microphone.

"These guys," he started, motioning to Rachel and Finn, "they're in love. And I think it's totally boring."

_Puck's jerk-act would probably do well here_, Quinn thought, and was proven right when everyone started laughing.

"They have been in love for years. For _years_! Years that have seen endless amounts of drugs consumed," he said, and Quinn saw Santana smirking. She knew they both were thinking of the bake sale they held in sophomore year, and the times they spent eating special cupcakes under the bleachers instead of going to homeroom.

"Loads of meaningless sex, thoroughly enjoyed, by me," she heard him say, and rolled her eyes. "These guys just stayed at home, as they do. They've been like a married couple so long, it's a relief that they're finally married."

Finn and Rachel smiled at each other, and Quinn fought the urge to puke. She decided that this was a great time to leave, and quietly made her way to the exit.

"So before I do my duty as a best man, and screw a bridesmaid – you know who you are – here's to Rachel and Finn. And now I give you, ladies and gentleman, the happy couple!"

Quinn was already outside by then, but heard Rachel speak instead of Finn, and tried not to roll her eyes at that.

"They say fairytales have happy endings, even though the passage can be rough. But Finn and I, we've been together since high school, and it's been smooth all the way."

_Beside the whole fighting-over-him thing, or has my role been blocked from everyone's memory?_

"Maybe that's a better kind of fairytale," Rachel said in a soft voice. Quinn could still hear it, barely but still. _It doesn't sound like Rachel. Rachel loves drama._

She hesitated for a split-second, but walked away. _I definitely don't belong here._

To be completely fair, Quinn had kind of counted on the wedding being an incident and everyone just forgetting about it. She should have known better; Rachel Berry was involved.

"Hi," Rachel said in a soft voice. Quinn realized now that Rachel had quieted down a little bit over the years, probably part of growing up.

"Hey." _What are you doing here?_

"I just wanted to come by and thank you in person," she answered Quinn's unspoken question. "It was a pleasure to have you at the wedding, and the flowers were so beautiful."

"Oh, you're welcome," she replied.

"Your shop is amazing, by the way!" Rachel said, gesturing around enthusiastically. "You've done a wonderful job. Although I must admit that I am rather surprised by your career choice."

"Yeah, it's not exactly what I had in mind myself. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, and then I decided to do something that I love, and maybe something pretty, that everyone loves."

"Well from that point of view you have made an excellent choice, because who doesn't love flowers? I must say that your orchids are extraordinary, though I prefer lilies myself."

_Lilies? Not pink roses?_

Rachel picked one of the brightest colored orchids up.

"What is this one?"

"It's called a bird of paradise. Real name is Strelitzia, named after Charlotte of Strelitz. She married King George III, history says that they never spent more than an hour apart," Quinn said, looking lovingly at the flower.

"That's a lovely story, Quinn. I can see that you really do know your flowers. As well you should, but I'm still adjusting to all this newfound information about you. I would never have pictured you as a florist."

"It took me a while to find my passion," Quinn admitted, putting the orchid away.

"Would you perhaps consider coming to dinner?"

Quinn shot Rachel a look.

"Sorry?"

"It will obviously be vegan, since I will be cooking, but I thought that you might enjoy it anyway. I was thinking that maybe we could talk, catch up, share some memories from Lima…"

She hesitated. Part of her wanted to crawl back into not having contact with anyone in Lima. But part of her _liked _acknowledging her past, being able to talk about it with people. Part of her also was starting to like Rachel, but if that was a good thing?

"I'd love to," her mouth had spoke for her, before she'd had the chance to over contemplate things more.

"Great! You'll be expected this Friday at 7, please don't be late. I shall write down the address."

Rachel threw Quinn a smile, and handed her the note.

"See you this Friday. 7 on the dot."

She didn't know why she was so nervous about telling Finn. Should she have consulted him beforehand? No, right?

"I invited Quinn to dinner tomorrow night," Rachel said.

"Quinn? Quinn Fabray? You spoke to her?"

"Yeah, I… I went to thank her, and invited her to dinner."

"Oh," he said, staying quiet for a second, clutching his morning paper. "Alright. Why?"

"To catch up?"

"You want to catch up with her? No offense, Rach, but she tortured you through all of high school."

"I know, I know. But I'm a forgiving person, as you know. And I got really different vibes from her. I honestly believe that we're going to be friends this time around. I feel like we clicked so much better, outside high school drama. We've both grown up, of course, so that helps, but I really felt like she was going to play a part in my life from now on."

Finn wisely kept his mouth shut. He was used to his wife's antics – her lack of a best friend throughout high school still bothered her sometimes, and he was pretty sure that this was another one of those things where Rachel's insecurities played too big of a role in her life and her decision making.

Now that they were married, Rachel knew that Finn wouldn't ever cheat on her again. But sometimes the old Rachel Berry still reared its head, and this was one of those times. Yes, she really did want to talk to Quinn – throughout the torturing, they still had maintained somewhat of a complex friendship, right? Right. – but Rachel Berry also had an ulterior motive.

"You see, here's my plan. I thought we could invite Puck. His internship is still for another 6 months, right? And he might be here for even longer! I was thinking, seeing as they seemed to get along perfectly well at the wedding, perhaps we should try to fix them up! Puck hasn't had a serious girlfriend in forever and I'm not sure Quinn even knows people here in New York!"

Puck was trying to become a business man. He was now on an internship at some kind of company – no, Rachel hadn't remembered which one – and he would try to get a job in New York after it ended.

"Puck doesn't want a serious girlfriend. And certainly not Quinn. There's too much history there, Rach. I really don't think it's a good idea."

"And I happen to believe that it is a spectacular idea!" Rachel said defiantly.

"Rachel, if this is about me and Quinn…"

"Finn, don't be ridiculous! Of course it isn't about you and Quinn. Do you really think that I still care about _that_? No, no. They have so much in common," she said. "So much history, Beth, Glee club…"

He looked skeptical.

"Which is what makes this a really bad idea."

"Which is what makes this a great idea!" She said enthusiastically.

"Alright, go ahead!" Finn replied, throwing up his hands in surrender to his stubborn wife. "Invite the both of them. But don't blame me when it becomes a train wreck."

Rachel had barely heard him finish his sentence, already clutching her phone with a smug smile.

There was one time which Quinn could pinpoint as the worst time of her life. It wasn't when she felt ugly. It wasn't when she was a depressed teenager. It wasn't even when she was pregnant and got kicked out of her house. _God, if you look at it from that point of view, my life looks really crappy._

No. The worst time of her life was when she'd just moved to New York.

One of the greatest things about New York was that you couldbe anonymous. It was the primary reason that Quinn had chosen New York for. It was also one of the things that she hated most sometimes.

Quinn used to be a person of one-night stands. Everyone gets lonely sometimes, and in her re-discovery of herself, she was able to put those one-night stands to a good use. She'd stopped doing that, though. She preferred not to think about being alone too often; she didn't mind it most of the time. Quinn was a solitary person by nature.

Quinn had fled home and everything she knew, but when she was lonely in New York, when she'd been lonely for too long, the unimaginable happened: she got homesick and needed her mother.

The relationship between Quinn and Judy Fabray had always been rocky, to say the least. It took a lot for Quinn to call her, but eventually, she did. Judy Fabray hadn't been able to speak to Quinn in months, and started sobbing on the phone until Quinn started sobbing too. It didn't take much – one good talk, and their relationship was better than ever. She still didn't want to come home, but she agreed to call her mom regularly from that moment on.

Judy wanted to make an effort. She'd practically lost Quinn to the city, and was determined not to say anything that could upset her daughter, but just listen and try not to judge. She didn't have much with Quinn, just their weekly phonecalls, and it was so little and so fragile that it could be lost too easily. That's why, when Quinn came out to her, she just swallowed her judgement and told Quinn she wouldn't tell her dad. Quinn said she didn't care anymore.

"Your call is early, did you finish work already?"

"I got off early, I've got plans tonight."

"Do you have a date you didn't tell me about, honey?"

"No," Quinn said. "Just having dinner with some friends."

She hesitated about telling her mom about Rachel and Finn, but decided against it. Her mother would take it as an invitation to force Quinn to come back to Lima, since she'd already seen everyone, and Quinn definitely wasn't going to do that.

"Do you have any plans tonight?"

"Just me and James Bond."

"Mom, please. You should get out there more often. Meet people."

"I already know everyone in Lima, remember?"

"Sometimes I wish you would get a life."

"I know you do. Sometimes I wish you would do the same."

Quinn bit her lip in response.

Rachel was fixing her mascara when she heard the door open.

"Hey Rach! Look what I found on the doormat!"

He stuck his head around the bathroom and smiled. "Wow, you look beautiful."

"I felt like dressing up," she replied coyly. "What did you—"

"Hey," another head popped up underneath Finn's. "I brought flowers!"

Rachel put down her mascara and turned around to greet Quinn with a hug. Instead, she was met with a huge bouquet.

"Hmm, they are lovely. I should have invited a florist over much sooner!"

Rachel was busying herself in the kitchen. She still wasn't a great cook, but was able to hold herself in the kitchen by now. Finn was talking about his job, and Rachel had already heard all of that before and she wasn't paying any attention to their conversation, in favor of keeping the food edible.

"So, how about you? What has happened in your life? Are you married, or are you gonna be married, or do you wanna be married…"

"Well no," Quinn said. "Maybe now the laws have changed, though." She fought a smile. She knew what was coming, and was enjoying the surprising effect it was going to have already.

"What are you…"

"I'm gay," Quinn said. Finn laughed. A loud noise came from the kitchen.

"Everything's fine!" She yelled in an absolute panicked voice. Finn didn't hear her.

"Gay? As in…"

"As in, I like girls."

Finn's face was blank for a moment, before he said: "Hmm."

Quinn nodded, trying to keep a straight face.

"Well done!" Finn said, surprising her.

The doorbell rang, then. "That would be Puck. Can you get it, Finn?"

"Puck?" Quinn asked. She looked behind her and didn't see Rachel. "Is he coming?"

The counter replied: "Yes, Puck is staying for dinner as well."

"Well, this should be fun."

"So, it's been 2 weeks, I have to ask. How much better is sex after marriage?"

"Puck!" Rachel said. Quinn smiled, and Finn said: "Dude, get married and find out."

"Puck couldn't do that," Quinn said. "He couldn't commit to just one girl. I've tried it with him."

"Well, perhaps he should!" Rachel managed. "There are many beautiful women out there."

"And I'm trying to have sex with as many as I can," Puck grinned. "Can't tame the Puckasaurus."

"Well, maybe there is one special girl for you out there," Rachel said, not so subtly motioning her head to Quinn.

"Rach," Finn said under his breath. Quinn fought a grin.

"And how will I know when I found her, hmm?" Puck said, looking straight into Quinn's eyes. "How will I know?"

"Well, you don't know immediately, of course." Rachel replied instantly. "But your world feels warm and comfortable and your life feels generally nice and pleasant. So you stay together, allowing your relationship to bloom into love, and that is when you know you have found the one," she finished, grabbing Finn's hand over the table.

"I'm with Rachel," Finn said dreamily.

"Yeah, me too," Puck said.

"I'm not," Quinn said. She took a deep breath and looked at Rachel.

"I think that you do know immediately. Your eyes connect and you already feel like you've known them your whole life. Everything after that proofs that you were right in that first moment, when you realized that you had been incomplete and now you are whole."

There was an impressed silence.

"I pick Quinn," Puck said.

"Yeah, I'm with her too," Finn agreed. "Who wants dessert?"

"Yes please," Quinn replied.

"No."

"No?"

"No," Rachel repeated. "If you truly believe that everyone who doesn't have all that is settling for less…"

"That's not what I'm saying."

"It actually is what you are saying."

"She said it nicer," Puck tried.

Finn stood up.

"So, dessert?"

"Dude, did you hear Quinn just now?" Puck said with a huge smile. "She totally just made that speech for me! She was so talking about our High School stuff. I knew she wanted to get back together with me."

"Well, that's great," Finn said, putting their plates in the dishwasher.

"I told you so, didn't I? Later tonight, I'm going to offer her a lift, convince her to have a drink at my apartment, and we're gonna have wild getting-back-together sex to make up that we never had break-up sex. Even though I offered her!"

"Great," Finn said again, stretching his arms. _It's not a secret, is it? No way, I can totally tell Puck._

"Quinn is a lesbian."

"Is that right?" Puck said with a blank expression. "Cool."

"So I think your plans for tonight have changed now."

"Anyone can change teams."

Finn paused his movements, before deciding not to comment and continuing.

"Well, not anyone," Puck amended, like Finn had expected. "I'm way too badass to change teams. But you know."

Rachel frowned when she looked out the window and saw a shadow on the balcony, standing near the edge with the rain pouring down on them. She opened the sliding door and saw Quinn, clutching an umbrella.

"Quinn! What are you doing?"

Quinn threw a wide smile over her shoulder. "New York is beautiful from up here."

"It's raining!"

"Come out!"

"I'm not risking my voice! You come in!"

Quinn smiled.

"I'm closing the door now, and I'm going to lock it. If you are so determined to catch a cold you can stay out there, but I'm not taking care of you when you get sick and I would strongly advise you to come back inside!"

"Relax, Rach. I'm coming in!" Quinn yelled over the sound of the rain.

She walked over to Rachel, and realized that despite her best attempts the umbrella hadn't kept her completely dry. It didn't matter. She felt, for some reason, delirious and silly yet deep and serious, all at the same time. Like she wanted to skip over to Rachel only to talk about the meaning of life. She thought it was probably smartest to keep it in and channel it into acting normal – she felt so good and happy, that she didn't want to scare Rachel away just yet. It had been long since she'd felt this way.

"I'd like to offer you an apology," Rachel said, looking up at Quinn through her eyelashes. "About dinner."

Quinn found that she didn't really want to talk about that. She didn't want to spoil the good mood.

"It's fine, I've eaten worse. I think I remember that you never were good in the kitchen. Didn't you burn the pancakes you tried to make for our senior year Glee club picnic?"

"I am actually great with baking! You must taste my I'm-sorry cookies one time, they are to die for. Unfortunately, I do not possess these skills when it comes to cooking. I have gotten way too used to take-out in my days. My dads always got take-out, and here in New York I never have time to cook, so…"

"Do you still go to Juillard?"

"I do, but I'm in my final year now, so it is fewer lessons and more time to audition."

"Oh. How is it going?"

"It's going alright, small parts left and right but, obviously, I have yet to land any kind of big break. I did just finish a short movie, though. It's about a girl who easily obsesses over things," she says with a cheeky grin. "She gets obsessed with comic books and thinks that Lucky Luke is the love of her life."

"It doesn't sound easy."

"It's not, but it is a lot of fun, actually." Rachel frowned concernedly. "Aren't you cold? Oh my God, Quinn, are you wet? You are, aren't you?"

"What?"

"I can see it! I wasn't being serious when I said that I wouldn't take care of you if you fell ill, but I'd still prefer it if you would stay healthy! We have to warm you up, you must be freezing! Here, take my jacket."

"No! I'm fine!"

"Take it!"

"It won't fit me anyway, I'm like, 5 inches taller than you!" Quinn said, pushing Rachel away with a laugh.

"That doesn't mean anything!" Rachel said, trying to throw her jacket over Quinn's shoulders. Quinn easily dodged it, and Rachel made it her mission to get Quinn down to her height.

"What are you doing?"

Quinn had never been so displeased with hearing Finn's voice.

"Nothing," Rachel said quickly. Quinn noticed that Rachel had somehow won, because she had an unknown jacket thrown over her shoulder.

"Puck wants to play strip-poker and eh…"

He threw a look between Rachel and Quinn.

"I really don't want to see him naked," Finn added.

"Let's get him out of here," Rachel said with a frown on her face. "It's getting late anyway, isn't it?"

They walked to the hallway, and Quinn tried to keep herself in check. She felt like she was either 7 or 17. She felt like she was a kid, having a sleepover with Brittany and Santana for the first time, overexcited about staying up so late and spending so much time with her friends, because it _didn't _have to end. They didn't have to go home.

Or like she was 17, and home was the last place that she wanted to be. Back when she was spending every minute that she could with anyone who would have her, and it felt like home was the worst place on earth.

For years, everywhere she went, Quinn had liked the fact that she had a home to get back to. A home in New York, that she'd made for herself, that was all hers, it was the best thing in her life. However, right now, it seemed like the last place she wanted to be.

She threw a look at Puck, who winked at her.

Okay, the _second_ last place she wanted to be.

Finn kissed her on the cheek, and she knew it was time to go. Her mind was racing.

_How do I say goodbye? Do I kiss her on the cheek? Do I hug her? Shake hands?_

"Well," Rachel said, and Quinn took a deep breath, trying to suppress the feeling like it was the end of a first date.

Rachel made the decision for her.

"Goodbye, Quinn."

_Or do we not touch at all?_

"Let's go, Q," Puck said. "Your ride is waiting."

Quinn gave Rachel a final smile and walked away. Rachel went back to the kitchen immediately, so only Finn was left to see Puck hump the air in a crude gesture, giving his best friend a thumb up.

"I live only a couple of more blocks away," Quinn said. "Take a left here."

"Or we could keep going and head straight for my place."

"Or you could take a left here."

Puck took a left and Quinn went back to gazing out of the window. Why was her heart pounding like this?

_Don't fall for Rachel. You _really _shouldn't fall for Rachel. You _really, really _shouldn't fall for Rachel. It's a bad idea. It's stupid, immature, and irresponsible to want what you can't have. It's high school Quinn. Is that what you want? High School Quinn?_

"Are you okay?"

"Why, because I don't want to have sex with you?" Quinn asked, rolling her eyes.

_How can you even consider falling for Rachel? You. Aren't. Falling. For. Rachel. Berry. It's Rachel Berry!_

_Yeah, that's kind of the problem. It's Rachel Berry._

_Stop it! You hated her in high school, you can't like her now!_

_A lot of things were different during high school. For one, hello, closet case?_

_You don't like Rachel. You _can't _like Rachel. Even if it isn't because it's Rachel freaking Berry, it's because of Finn. _

_Rachel and Finn broke up, like, 4 times._

_Yeah, but they're _married _now. She's _married. _Rachel is _**married**.

_I get it, okay?_

_Married. As in, together for life, soulmates, forever, wedding ring, children, grandchildren, _**married!**

"Quinn? Did you even hear a word I just said?"

"What did you say, Puck?" Quinn replied, massaging her temples.

"You don't have to have sex with me, but that doesn't mean you have to ruin my mood by moping around."

"I'm sorry," she sighed. "I am. Really."

"Well, you're thinking about something. Maybe you should talk about it, with me. Just 'cause I'm a fucking badass doesn't mean I'm not a nice guy."

Quinn couldn't help a smile.

"You are a nice guy."

"Thank you. Do you make exceptions with the whole being gay thing for nice guys?"

"No," Quinn said. "But I do talk to them. You're right, I need to talk about it. If you buy me a coffee, I'll talk about it with you."

"I was actually in the mood for tequila."

"Puck, I'm already feeling less like talking to you."

He pulled over at a coffee shop. "Alright. I can so totally do the listening-thing," he said, and got out of the car.

"It's a girl thing, right?" Puck said, looking dead into her eyes with a serious expression.

Quinn hesitated. "Yes, it is."

"I knew it. It had to be. So, it's dark, you're in…" he hesitated, "your cheerio's outfit. It's hot and there is a girl, one of those vegetarians, grinding against you. Who is she?"

"I'm vegan now," Quinn said.

"Fuck, you gave up bacon?" He said and whistled impressed. Quinn gave him a sour look which brought him back all too much to their high school days. "Never mind. So, you're totally horny and she's getting closer. Come on, tell me all about it. Spare me no details."

Puck gave her an expectant look and Quinn stirred her coffee thoughtfully.

"Have you ever had feelings for someone, but there was already someone else?"

_You don't have feelings for Rachel! You haven't seen her in forever! God, just because she's hot doesn't mean you're suddenly in love with her or something!_

Puck gave Quinn a dark gaze while she waited for his answer. It was silent for a little too long. Quinn might have noticed it, but she was too busy contemplating her own thoughts.

"I did. I do. The best ones are always taken."

"So, what do you do?" Quinn asked eagerly.

"Have sex with them anyway."

"Oh," she replied quietly. She finally caught his meaningful look and remembered once more exactly _who _she was talking to and what their shared history was together. "_Oh._"

"The partner is their problem, it's not mine."

Quinn bit her lip and avoided his eyes while another awkward silence settled in.

"Yeah," she started. "You know, I'm really trying _not _to do anything like that anymore. You know. Cheat, break others up, be a homewrecker. In case you haven't noticed, it didn't work out all that well for me during high school. Or for you, by the way. I've been trying this thing where I try not to hurt other people. I think that if they aren't available, you should just give up, look for someone who is."

"Your place or mine? Come on, you know how good I am in bed!"

Quinn shook her head at the memory.

"Boys and their arrogance."

"Come on, Quinn! Let the Puckster rock your world!"

"Rachel, you _have _to stop now with the matchmaking, okay? Quinn and Puck, it's not going to happen. You have to give it up," Finn said, throwing toilet paper into their basket.

"Finn Hudson, don't be ridiculous! I don't know what you are talking about. They _left _together! I recognize a good sign when I see one, and I promise you, these two will have figured things out in no time! No time, I tell you!"

"Rachel!" Finn said, sighing. God, his wife could be so _stubborn_!

"Listen," he started, "there's something you should know. Quinn is…"

He looked up, only to see one familiar and one unfamiliar face round the corner. "Right here! Hello!"

Quinn's eyebrows shot up when she saw the couple. "Finn! Hello."

"We were just talking about you."

"All good I hope," Quinn replied, touching her hair. She was suddenly very conscious that she hadn't washed it in 3 days. She also felt like she had too much energy, which translated into jumpy movements.

"This is Edie," she said before an awkward silence could fall over them. "Edie, this is Finn."

"Nice to meet you," Edie said, not looking at Finn, but focusing on Quinn instead.

"And this is Rachel."

"Hi," Rachel said, fixing a wide smile on her face. "It's lovely to meet some of Quinn's friends. We only recently reconnected, but I do believe it would be wonderful to be involved a little in Quinn's life. It's wonderful to make your acquaintance."

Quinn closed her eyes tightly.

"Quinn?" Edie said hesitantly.

"Oh, sorry," Rachel said with an apologetic look at Quinn, like she knew she how big of a mistake she had just made. "I forgot she goes by Lucy now."

"Right," Edie said. "Luce. Lucy."

It had been cold and rainy all week in New York, and Quinn couldn't help but wonder why in the world Rachel was still wearing summer dresses. Her eyes traced up, avoiding Rachel's burning gaze and skipping straight to her hair. It was shiny, it looked soft and it was definitely clean. _Damn it. Of course._

Edie poked her painfully between her ribs, and Quinn decided that the time for small talk had come and gone and now it was just time to get out of there.

"Thank you for dinner," she said and finally met Rachel's eyes. The jumpiness multiplied by tenfold. If she wasn't careful, she'd be skipping down aisle 3. "We really should do that again."

"I will most definitely make sure that we will," Rachel said with an intense look.

"Great," Quinn said with a growing smile on her face. "We're just going to… yeah."

"See you later," Finn yelled after her, even though she was 2 aisles further already.

"Okay, what the fuck?"

Quinn sighed. Her jumpiness had subsided but not yet disappeared completely. _Stupid. Stupid. Fool. Fool. _She knew what had caused it, and by the looks of it, so did Edie.

"You can start explaining. Who the fuck is Quinn?"

She hesitated. Her bubble was bursting and her old life was flooding in through the cracks. She liked her protection. But she feared that she already had given it up when she allowed Rachel back in her life. Well, Rachel and Finn

"I am. I am Quinn. My full name is Lucy Quinn Fabray, you can Google me. In high school, I went by my second name after I had a nose job after middle school. When we moved to a different city after that, I asked my parents to call me Quinn."

Edie nodded slowly, and Quinn felt a pang of guilt shoot through her stomach. There was so much that she hadn't told to someone who had been her friend for over 3 years.

"And who _was _that?"

"Well, Finn-"

"The girl, Luce."

"Finn and Rachel went to High School with me, and I hadn't seen them since until I ran into them a couple of weeks ago. I had dinner at their place last Friday."

"And this Rachel, did you date her or something?"

"No," Quinn paused. She was about to tell a whole lot more than she'd ever planned on telling.

"I dated Finn."

Edie took it in, and said airily: "So I take it you weren't gay in high school."

"Oh I was," Quinn said surely. "God, trust me, I was. But I just didn't know what I know now."

"But Finn and Rachel are together," Edie said slowly. "Right?"

"Since high school, they first started dating right after Finn and I broke up. They just got married."

"They're married?" Edie whistled through her teeth. "That's bad, Luce. Really bad. She's not just heterosexual, but like, _uber_ heterosexual."

"I know, okay?"

"It's been written in the stars, it's been carved in stone. This girl was meant to be straight."

"Edie."

"I mean like, straight as a liner. Straight as the walls of the Empire State Building. Straight as—"

"I get it!" Quinn said loudly, which finally shut Edie up.

"That's what I was trying to tell you," Finn said. "Quinn is gay."

"Gay? Are you telling me Quinn Fabray is a lesbian?"

"I am. Do you think that girl was her girlfriend?"

"I don't know," Rachel said quietly. "Excuse me for being so quiet now, but I really need a minute to process this. I must admit that, even though I pride myself for having an excellent gaydar, which I should have with _my _parents, I did not see this revelation coming."

"Hey! We were just talking about you!" Edie yelled over the main path.

Quinn closed her eyes.

"Oh really?" Finn said with an amused smile.

"Yeah, really," the light blonde girl replied bubbly. "How is your shopping going?"

Finn hugged Rachel close with one of his huge arms. "It's great. Shopping sucks but Rachel makes it almost okay."

"Ahww, that's so sweet," Edie gushed heartily. "Don't you think that they're cute together, Lucy?"

"Yeah, just great," Quinn said, giving Rachel an embarrassed smile.

"Edie, are you gay?" Finn suddenly asked in a serious voice.

"Oh god," Rachel said.

"Gay? Gay? I am ecstatic!" Edie called out. "Gleefully ecstatic!"

"And do you two…"

"No," Quinn said quickly. "No we don't."

"I've tried, and I've tried, but she loves another," her friend replied.

"We should go. Now. Talk to you later!"

"Later," Rachel replied to Quinn softly.

Quinn and Edie disappeared around the corner.

"So, I guess that Quinn and Edie are not an item," Finn said with a goofy grin.

"And indeed, your subtlety was astounding."

If there was one thing Quinn liked about being a florist, it was making deliveries. People always looked so happy to see you, like they had been waiting for you. They had, but that didn't matter. She was in a good mood when she made her way over to a restaurant on 72nd, knowing she was on her way to another satisfied costumer.

"Over there," the waiter said, and Quinn smiled when she saw who was waiting for her.

"Oh no," she said. "No, no, no."

"Nice, huh?" The man behind the table said, spreading his arms widely.

"Yeah, real cute, Puck."

"I know you want to kiss me. I know, you know, so you should just give in, babe!"

"You and me, it's not going to happen, Puckerman. You should put it out of your head," Quinn said defiantly. She was determined not to leave _any _hope behind.

"It's just a kiss, what's the worst that could happen?"

She arched an eyebrow.

"If you really have to ask that, there must be something wrong with your memory."

When she saw that the hope had gone from his eyes, she sighed.

"I can do friends with you, but that's it. We can be friends."

"Friends, huh? I could have a gay best friend. That could be me."

"Well, I could be that friend," Quinn said. "But that is it, okay?"

"Okay," he said. "It's better than nothing, right?"

Quinn smiled at him and sat down across from her ex-boyfriend. He smiled back at her, before saying: "How sweet, you brought me flowers!"

After the dinner, Quinn had spent some time Googling Rachel and it turned out she was pretty easy to find. The movie she'd mentioned was called _Lucky Leia_, and Quinn found out that the premiere was in a small indie theatre a couple of blocks away from Juillard. Before she knew it, she'd clicked, clicked again, and again, and suddenly had booked a ticket to the premiere.

It took her a while to pick out her most hipster-ish outfit, and then there was the dilemma if she should go with a bandana or a head band or with a hat. She tried to keep her mind off the fact that Rachel was going to be there, but that wasn't easy.

_She probably won't see you anyway. She won't have time for you, it's the premiere to her first movie. So it doesn't matter if Rachel would like your outfit. It really doesn't._

She still tried a little harder than she normally would have.

Quinn was pleasantly surprised by the number of people in the small cinema. Everyone that wanted to get in could get in, but she saw that the movie had almost sold out. Her ticket said that her seat was located on the 9th row, which was more to the back. She tried to keep the mindset of _just-going-to-the-movies _but the fact that she _knew _Rachel was out here somewhere still kept her on edge.

Her stomach jumped when she saw Rachel in the popcorn line. She joined the other girl.

"Hey, superstar!"

Rachel jumped.

"Quinn! What are you doing here?"

"I came to see your movie. Couldn't very well miss it."

"I am honored. Where are you sitting?"

"9th row, 2nd seat."

"Would you like to sit next to me?"

Quinn frowned. _Didn't see that one coming. Sitting next to Rachel in the dark, hm._

"It's just," Rachel heaved a deep sigh. "It's just that, I'm here solo tonight, because Finn had this horrible last-minute work thing that he couldn't get out of, despite the fact that I told him multiple times that he _had _to be there tonight. I mean, this is a big moment for me, he should be there to support me! But instead that horrible boss of his pulled him away, and now I have to sit by myself."

Rachel started pouting, and Quinn suppressed a wide smile. _Adorable!_

"I can't very well sit by myself during this milestone in my career, can I?"

"No you can't. Or, well, you shouldn't."

"So you'll sit next to me?" Rachel said with a hopeful smile.

"I'd love to."

"Yay! Come on, let's go! I want to be the first one in there."

Rachel dragged Quinn over to the 1st row, throwing looks over her shoulder at the blonde woman behind her. Quinn seemed to have matched her outfit with her surroundings, because Rachel had never seen her look so indie. _Very thoughtful. I should perhaps do that more often, too._

"You look very fitting tonight," Rachel complimented her. "And very beautiful."

"Thanks, you look…" she looked at Rachel's short black dress which was all glamour and zero hipster, "not quite so fitting but still beautiful."

"Come on, sit down," Rachel smiled, before she launched into a monologue about the movie. Quinn listened, and she was almost caught off guard with how attentive Quinn was looking at her. She knew, she _knew _that Quinn was actually trying to pay attention to what she was saying.

"Leia was raised in the same way too. Her parents were obsessed with Star Wars, obviously, and she got the obsessive behavior from them. Okay, so at one point, she falls in love with this college boy who is going to a party dressed up as a cowboy and she starts stalking him. He wants to help her, partly for her sake and partly for his own. Are you still catching on?"

"You can also allow me to just watch the movie, let it be full of surprises and fill me in on the details later. I promise that I won't forget a thing."

"Alright," Rachel said, trying to keep her abrasive nature in check.

"Or you could just ramble on, of course."

"It's just that, the right information is so valuable to this movie! The experience, it will be so much more impressive! So actually…"

"It's starting," Quinn whispered. Rachel suddenly noticed the lights were dimming.

"Enjoy!" She said in an urgent whisper. Quinn grabbed her hand and squeezed it for a second before letting go.

80 minutes into the movie and Rachel couldn't keep her focus on it. She felt like she'd watched maybe 5 minutes of her own debut movie. This was only the second time she'd watched it. It was the premiere, damnit! She should pay attention so she could criticize her own performance later! The second time around, there are so much more things that catch your eye. But no, no, no. Rachel's eye had to be caught by Quinn Fabray, someone who _was_ paying attention to the movie. She could only see Quinn because of the light that came from the screen, but that was enough for Rachel to see her, and enough to keep staring.

_What are you doing? Why are you staring at Quinn Fabray?_

_It's so strange that she is here right now. With you. You're at your first movie premiere with Quinn Fabray!_

_Or Lucy. Whatever. She's different now, she likes girls now._

Rachel was self-centered, and admittedly so. So she couldn't help but wonder.

_Could she ever like me like that?_

_Probably not, and that's a good thing too._

_Why? I'm hot!_

_Yes, but you are Rachel Berry._

_We'll see about that. The sex scene is coming up next. Let's watch her._

Rachel kept her gaze intensely on Quinn's face, after keeping half an eye on the screen to see when it would start. She wasn't disappointed, because she could hear Quinn suck in a deep breath the moment Rachel appeared on screen, naked.

_Oh, she's so turned on by me right now._

_She's so pretty when her skin is flushed!_

Quinn grabbed the barrier between their seats firmly, until her knuckles were almost white. Rachel hesitated, but placed her hand next to it, the side of their hands touching.

The thoughts inside of Rachel muted, but still she couldn't bring herself to watch the screen. She could only keep her eyes trained on the woman next to her. Her eyes kept tracing, tracing everything, again and again. And God, she really couldn't help it when her face got closer to Quinn's. It was only to study the other woman better.

A lock of hair was obscuring her view from Quinn's face. This was unacceptable. Rachel lifted her hand and slowly tucked the lock away behind Quinn's ear. The blonde woman turned to face Rachel. The stormy look in her hazel eyes made Rachel's stomach twist even in the dark. She didn't think, but she knew. She knew that she couldn't help what was going to happen. She knew that she couldn't _not _do it. She _had _to bring her face closer. She _had _to allow Quinn's hand to cup the back of her neck. She _was meant _to taste Quinn's sweet breaths, moments before she would do what she felt like she'd been meant to do all her life…

The lights flicked on and Rachel was shaken from her daydream, only to realize that everything that had happened after her hand touched Quinn's, hadn't happened outside of her mind. Her stomach felt uncomfortable knotted. Her director dragged her away from her seat, so they could take in the applause, but her eyes were darkened and boring into Quinn's intensely. She closed her eyes and chewed on her lip.

_This can't happen. _It was clear inside her mind. _I love Finn. I am straight. This can't be._


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Hey guys! So, this isn't the last part yet. It's part 2. I just really wanted to post, because you guys keep me motivated to write and I didn't want to put it on hold. This is what I've written so far. I think I'm going to go with a more Glee ending than an Imagine Me & You ending, but the whole balancing it out is going to continue still. I'm so glad that a couple of you liked it =) it really sucks that the transitions between the scenes keep getting skipped. It doesn't matter what I do, put a star or a hyphen or a squiggle or an extra blank line, FF doesn't seem to accept it. Hopefully it's still understandable. Enjoy this chapter! And remember, reviews equal motivation, inspiration, probably quicker updates and of course, loads of love and cookies!**

* * *

><p>"It was amazing," Quinn reassured Rachel for the umpteenth time. "I loved it. Really."<p>

Rachel smiled and stared at Quinn.

"Don't you… have to go? You have an early day tomorrow, don't you?"

"No, it's fine! The shop doesn't open 'till noon on Sundays."

"Oh." _This can't go on like this. _"Quinn, there is something that I need to talk to you about. It's been distressing me for a while now. When I'm with you…"

"Actually, I forgot," Quinn said quickly. "I have an early delivery! I really should be going now."

"Of course, right," Rachel replied.

"I'm really sorry Rach. But tonight was amazing."

And Quinn jogged off to grab the nearest cab, while Rachel found that she'd returned to the bad habit of biting her nails.

* * *

><p>Rachel was determined to just forget about it. It was something that she was terrible at – just forgetting about things – but she was going to do it now anyway, because, well, there wasn't much of a choice.<p>

She was going to allow herself to just have fun today. She was going to rent a couple of dvd's and have a small musical marathon while Finn was at work. She picked up RENT, My Fair Lady and Cabaret before handing them over to the girl behind the desk. "These please."

"Alright," she said and started typing on her computer. Rachel's eyes wandered around the shop.

She averted her eyes when they hit the porn section, only to throw another look at it. She'd seen something. Rachel took a few hesitant steps and stared at the 'gay/lesbian' section. A strange fluttering low in her stomach made her aware that she should absolutely _not _be looking at this. Porn is horrible. It's absolutely degrading, these women often have terrible lives and _God, _she should not want to watch this!

"All done," she heard from behind her. Rachel felt like she'd been caught red-handed and quickly made her way back to the desk, before changing her mind and grabbing the first movie within reach.

"And this one, please."

"Georgie's Bush," the girl read out slowly, before a knowing grin spread across her face.

"It's for educational purposes."

"Call it what you want. Great choice, by the way. This one, you wanna watch!"

_What has gotten into me? _Rachel thought to herself, already partly regretting her decision.

* * *

><p>Rachel paused the dvd of Georgie's Bush and took a couple of deep breaths. Her head was pounding and her skin felt clammy, and she didn't even want to begin to address the space between her legs. She tried to push every and any thought of Quinn from her mind.<p>

_Just satisfying your curiosity. For any future roles. You never know how helpful it could be to know how to behave in bed with someone of the same sex._

The knot in her stomach cued her in to the lies she was telling herself, and she decided to try harder to convince herself.

_Notes_, Rachel thought. _I'll make notes. If that isn't professional, I don't know what is._

She searched around for a pen and paper, and settled down on the floor again. She'd started out on the couch, but had scooted closer to take a better look. Otherwise, what was the purpose of watching it at all?

She pressed play again before feeling the need to pause it once more. She shifted uncomfortable and felt the stickiness between her legs like a guilty whisper. _Notes_, she reminded herself.

_What the hell is she doing with those fingers?_

The door slammed and Rachel's disposition changed to borderline panic. She'd done nothing wrong, right? Yet still she was going to do her best to hide it. She was just putting the disc back in its box when her husband walked in.

"Hey Rach," he said with a disarming smile. "I'm really happy to see you."

"Hey!" Rachel said, her voice cracking. _You're an actress! Act! _"You're home early!"

"Yeah, just for lunch. I just had to get out of there, you know? So, what were you doing?"

"Nothing." _Too quickly, Rachel. Act natural!_

"What nothing?" Finn asked, kissing her on the cheek. "Oh, you got some dvds? Great! Which one do you want to watch tonight?"

He took the three boxes out of her hand before she could do anything about it, and Rachel tried to calm her heart.

"I remember this one came out. I saw it with Sam and Puck, I think. It was alright. Oh, my mom made me watch this. Totally boring. And…"

A cheeky grin appeared on his face. "Georgie's Bush?"

"What?" Rachel said, gasping. She ripped the box from his hand and started laughing, hoping it didn't sound too fake.

"Oh wow, this most certainly is embarrassing. I'm afraid that this is a mistake, because I surely didn't pick this. I'll take it back first thing tomorrow, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," Finn said quickly, looking dead into Rachel's eyes. "It's porn, right?"

"I should think so, yes."

"And porn is degrading."

"Of course, obviously it is."

"Let's watch it anyway," he said with a pleading look. He smiled at her. "Come on, Rach. You know things haven't been the best in that department."

Rachel sighed and averted her eyes.

"I know it's my fault," Finn continued. "I've been so tired after work, and when we do, you know, I know I do-"

"No, no, it's me," Rachel assured him. "But I still don't want to watch it."

"Why not?" Finn said, begging his wife with his eyes.

"It doesn't turn me on," she said cheerfully, planting a short kiss on his lips before skipping off to the kitchen.

"Well, that makes one of us," Finn said softly, eyeing the box whistfully.

* * *

><p>Sure, Finn had made a joke out of it, but that doesn't mean it didn't come from a genuine place. Things really <em>had <em>been getting slack in that department, and Finn couldn't help but wonder. Was it because they just got married? Was it because of work? Was it because Rachel was under stress from school?

He'd dialed his home number without hesitance, only to be met with the answering machine of Burt and Carole Hummel. Now he was questioning his decisionmaking, but the person on the other side of the line was already picking up. They were family now, right? And guys are still guys, even if they are…

"Leroy Berry."

"Leroy! Hey! It's Finn."

"Finn? Is everything alright with Rachel?"

"Yeah, yeah, sure, everything's fine," he quickly assured his father-in-law, before scraping his throat.

"Actually, there was something I wanted to talk to you about. Man to man. Married man to married man."

"Okay," Leroy said in a deep voice. Finn was suddenly glad he was doing this over the phone.

"So, Rach and I have been married for a little while now, and things have been going a little down hill in the… *cough* bedroom department, if you know what I mean. And I was wondering, I mean, I know you're gay and all that but you got married once too, and if you-"

"Finn. Stop talking."

It stayed silent for a few seconds until Leroy was assured that Finn had honored his request.

"Okay. Rachel is my daughter. I like you well enough, I think you're a good man, you treat my girl well and you're the only one I can ever talk to about Football, but this is not acceptable. Because when you talk to me about this, the only thing I can think is that that jerk is defiling my daughter."

Finn swallowed hard, and faked a laugh.

"Well, we're not teenagers anymore, are we? So it should be better than back when Rachel lived at home, right?"

"You'd think so," Leroy said.

"Yeah!"

"But no."

"Oh."

"Hold on a second. Hiram wants you."

"I'm not sure if—hey Hiram, how is it going, man?"

"Happy 4th of July! How are my grandchildren coming along?"

"Your… eh…" Finn stayed quiet while he heard Leroy's voice in the background. Was it the 4th?

"_Hiram, honey, bad timing."_

"I should go," Finn said. "Telephone bills and all that. Bye!"

"Don't forget to have sex!" Hiram yelled into the phone and Finn hung up by slamming it down.

"Tonight," he said to himself, "we're going to have awesome sex."

* * *

><p>It was perfect. He'd seen Rachel shave her legs that very morning and they could go see the fireworks tonight. It was like it was meant to be. He was mature, Rachel had her time of month 2 weeks ago, they were as settled as it would get. There was a big possibility Rachel was pregnant, with how she was acting. He hadn't realized it until talking to Hiram, but it would explain a lot.<p>

If she wasn't, he was going to make it happen tonight. Everything would be alright, he was sure of it. This was the step they were meant to take now, and they would take it perfectly, like all the other steps in their relationship.

He kissed Rachel during the fireworks, and it was perfect. It was already perfect and so romantic, and he planned on making this a night neither of them would ever forget.

Rachel was in a horrible mood. She usually loved the fourth of July, but her mood had been sour all week and she didn't even have her period to use as an excuse. She'd somewhat admitted it to herself. There was something going on with her thoughts about Quinn and the timing was awful. This was _not _the point in her life in which she could afford to be… what? Spontaneously bisexual? Bicurious? Just curious? Just confused?

And it didn't help that when Finn almost created the perfect moment – outside of the fact that he tasted like hotdogs and Rachel felt like she was killing an animal with her bare hands, she'd _specifically asked _Finn to not kiss her right after eating meat! – she couldn't get into it and opened her eyes, spotting one familiar face in the crowd. Just seeing Quinn made her stomach flip and her mood turn even sourer than before. She broke away her lips from Finn's.

"Let's go home."

Finn grinned.

* * *

><p>Quinn had called it an early night, mostly because Edie had a different idea of a good night out than Quinn. They'd left right after the fireworks, and Quinn had resisted Edie's attempts to drag her along to some hip gay-club in favor of her own bed. Now Quinn was again at that point that she'd been trying to avoid by going out – alone with her thoughts about being alone, and alone with her thoughts about Rachel.<p>

She was a little less alone when the phone rang. Sure, it scared the hell out of her because she'd been falling into practically a trance with her focused thinking for the last hour or so, and yeah, she fell off her couch, but still.

"Hello?"

"Hey," a soft high voice came from the other side of the line. "I just found your number in my brother's old phone, he left it here, and I really wanted to talk to you."

"Who is this?" She asked, though she had a suspicion.

"It's H, of course!"

"Hey there, H. Shouldn't you be in bed? Shouldn't you have been in bed like, 4 hours ago?"

"My parents think I am in bed, but I stayed up late to watch the fireworks."

"I used to do that too. I won't sell you out."

"Thanks."

"What did you need to tell me?"

"I like a boy and he likes me back!" the young girl squeaked into Quinn's ear.

"Aww," Quinn gushed. "Is he cute?"

"Yeah, he's from my class and he told me today! And I've liked him since forever!"

"Congratulations! Your first boyfriend!"

"Not yet," she said. "But I'm still so happy! Can't wait till you get a boyfriend!"

No-one in Lima would have explained. Quinn heaved a deep sigh. It was kind of her duty.

"H, I should tell you something. I do think I'll spend the rest of my life with one person. But that person is going to be a woman."

"Oh I get it," she said. "My best friend is Martha Chang and I'd much rather spend my whole life with her than with any of the boys I know."

"Exactly," Quinn smiled.

"Doesn't mean you're a lesbian or anything."

Quinn laughed. This was probably the best she was going to get.

"Right. Now, off to bed! It's way too late already!"

"Night, Quinn!"

"Night."

* * *

><p>"What kind of tea do you want?" Finn asked from the kitchen.<p>

Rachel massaged her temple. _I think I need alcohol tonight._

"I'll have some white wine."

Finn walked to the doorway and leaned against it, looking huge and incredibly sweet at the same time.

"Rachel, I need to ask you something."

"What is it?" _Oh god, oh god, he knows. Have I been that obvious? Do I talk in my sleep?_

"Are you pregnant?"

There was a stunned silence while Rachel recovered from the unexpected question.

"Have you been talking to dad?"

"Well, that too. But I thought, it would just explain… a lot of your… your… recent behavior."

Rachel's look softened. "No, I'm not."

Finn processed it, but his face quickly morphed into a cheeky grin.

"Do you want to get pregnant?"

Rachel frowned.

"I thought we agreed we would wait with that."

"But wait until what? We're as married as we could possibly get, we're completely settled, we've got our rhythm, why not, Rach?"

"What about my career? Have you paused to think about that?"

"I… yes, but we both know that it could take years until you don't have to worry about that anymore! What do you think?"

Finn's cell rang, and there was a silence until he picked it up.

"Rob, hello."

Rachel rolled her eyes as Finn walked to his desk in their bedroom. "I'm sure I had it here…"

If he was talking to his boss, it could very well take a while. She sighed and plopped down on the couch.

_I shouldn't have overreacted like that when I saw Quinn,_ she thought to herself. _It was perhaps a little overdramatic. And now I haven't spoken to her at all. Not since we ran into her at the supermarket._

Rachel hesitated, but her impulsive side got the best of her. She grabbed the phone and dialed Quinn's number. It rang a couple of times before she picked up. _"Hello?"_

Rachel hung up immediately, already regretting her stupid impulse immensely. Why was she acting like this? What the hell was the matter with her?

Finn walked back in with an unpleased expression on his face. He looked over to his wife and gave his best puppy-eyed expression.

"I'm so sorry Rach, but I _have _to go to this meeting Tuesday night."

"Tuesday? But… You were the one who was so incredibly determined to go to a Yankees game! You said you'd never been to one and that you thought it was your duty as a New Yorker!"

"I know what I said, babe, but I really can't get out of this one. You're gonna have to go with someone else."

"But I don't want to go with someone else," Rachel said pouting. The phone rang again, and Finn was the one to pick it up.

"Finn Hudson."

"Finn? It's Quinn."

"Quinn, hello!" Rachel's eyes widened comically. "Why are you calling?"

"Someone called my phone, and I-"

"Yeah, great," Finn interrupted her. "Listen, I just thought of something. What are you doing Tuesday night?"

"Nothing yet, why?"

Rachel started shaking her head comically and stood up, but Finn ignored her.

"Well, we've got tickets to this thing, but I have to work that day. Do you maybe want to go with Rachel?"

"Well… I… I… sure, I'd love to!"

"Great, Rachel will call you with the details. Goodnight!"

"Yeah, goodnight."

Finn hung up with a satisfied smile on his face.

"You shouldn't have done that, Finn," Rachel said darkly. "We just recently reconnected again. I'm not even sure if she is comfortable spending time with people from her past yet."

"Weren't you saying you were, like, meant to be friends now a little while ago?"

"Yes, indeed but…"

"See, I do listen!" He said with a wide grin.

"Have you even told her what we're going to do?"

"No, but she was a cheerleader. She loves football games."

* * *

><p>"Quinn, I must say that I am embarrassed to be here with you. I never thought that I could be just that, but I am now. You were a cheerleader on and off for 3 years in High School, and you don't know the rules?"<p>

"Well, I was kind of busy during the games, Rachel. I don't know if you've ever seen a cheerleading routine by Sue Sylvester, but they're pretty complicated and they kind of require your attention."

"But how does the cheerleading overshadow who they're cheering for? I believe that this is a matter of hierarchy, and football should be higher than cheerleading!"

"Did we even go to the same school?"

"Look," Rachel interrupted her. "I think he's going to try and score a touchdown!"

Quinn's eyes followed the small dot on the field, running between other small dots, dodging them left and right. The crowd spurred him on, and Rachel jumped up with her war face on, cheering on her team. Was it Quinn's imagination, or was Rachel's voice the clearest out of all of them? It was probably because she was too focused on the brunette and especially her voice. She reprimanded herself, and missed that the dot was tackled by number 9 from the other team.

Rachel screamed, completely outraged, and yelled toward the field: "You're a wanker, number 9!"

_Wanker? Who says wanker when you can say fucker?_

But Quinn had realized something. It wasn't her imagination – Rachel's voice silenced everyone. Her voice was by far the loudest in the stadium. She could maybe even be louder than the commentator if she wanted to. Her mouth dropped. She knew that Rachel had one hell of a voice, but in this context she noticed for the first time exactly how hard it was.

"How did you do that?"

"What?"

"Yell so loudly. My voice always gets shrill when I yell."

"I offered 4 workshops called voice & volume back in Lima, Quinn. They were even complimentary for Glee members, but I can't remember you ever taking one of them."

"No, but can you teach me anyway? Now?"

"Well, first of all, you have to use your stomach muscles. Don't give me that look, I know you have them. I believe your abs were one of the most-talked about things in the locker rooms. But I would very much recommend it if you'd stand up, so you can flex them better."

Quinn stood up, and Rachel placed a hand on her stomach. She could feel the abs flex beneath the thin fabric of Quinn's shirt, and she swallowed thickly. Who would imagine Rachel Berry in this position? And then to think that Rachel knew it was about to get a whole lot worse.

"Now broaden your diaphragm."

"My what? I don't think I have one."

"Quinn, don't joke around, I'm trying to be serious here. You wanted this, remember?" Rachel said. She didn't want to fall out to Quinn, but she was getting frustrated with herself and her behavior around Quinn.

"Sorry, Rach. Where's my diaphragm?"

"I told you a thousand times in Glee. It's one of the most important parts of singing, especially since we often had a small group that had to fill a big hall with sound."

"I guess I did it wrong, then."

Rachel took a deep breath, and slowly moved her hand up over Quinn's stomach. If she thought that doing it slowly would make it feel a little less like she was point blank grabbing Quinn, she was right. This was worse. She felt like an absolute pervert, like she was feeling her friend up.

And even worse, like she was enjoying it.

Quinn was very much conflicted. If Rachel went anymore up, this night could take a whole and other turn. First, how much self control was she supposed to have? If Rachel went up any further she'd be touching her boob and _come on_, there's only so much a girl can take. Second, if she went any further up, she'd be able to feel Quinn's heartbeat and her heart was _racing_. There would be questions.

But Rachel's hand stopped, right at the underside of her breasts. "Here is your diaphragm. You have to push it out against my hand."

"I can't feel it," Quinn said, swallowing to get a little saliva going in her sandpaper mouth. "Perh… perhaps if you put both hands there."

Rachel stood behind Quinn, a sweet smell piercing her senses when her nose brushed Quinn's neck. She placed her left hand on top of her right one, and said: "There. Do you feel it?"

Quinn nodded.

"Now imagine your mouth is a cathedral."

"My mouth is _what_?" _She is adorable._

"It's about the space you have to fill. Imagine your mouth is this huge cathedral, and you have to fill it with sound."

"You lost me, sorry," Quinn said, shaking her head.

"Come on, Quinn. Try it."

The blonde girl shook her head again and loosened herself from Rachel's grip, albeit reluctantly.

"Maybe you should go back to try and explain the game to me."

* * *

><p>"So, what do you want to do now?" Rachel asked cheerfully. She skipped beside Quinn, linking their arms together and looking up at her expectantly.<p>

"I don't know."

"Great, I get to choose again! So, I know this amazing place where they don't have _just _karaoke, but _musical _karaoke! Usually you have to make arrangements beforehand, but they're rather familiar with me so I'm inclined to believe they'll be willing to make an exception."

"I feel like dancing."

"Dancing?" Rachel said, and contemplated the option, resting the tip of her finger against her chin before snapping her fingers.

"I believe I have the perfect place for that, too!"

Rachel threw in a coin like she'd done it a million times before. "Are you familiar with Dance Dance Revolution?"

"I'm not, but I'm open to the idea," Quinn grinned. _You are in so much trouble, Fabray. _

"Alright, I happen to know that you are quite an accomplished dancer. At the very least a most accomplished mover, with an admirable amount of body control, so I think you should fall in step with me rather easily. Just follow my lead."

And before she knew it, Dynomite by Taio Cruz was playing, and all the other songs of the rest of the night slowly took her back to High School.

* * *

><p>They'd been walking around New York for a long time. For the first time in what felt like forever, Rachel was listening. And for the first time in what felt like forever, Quinn was talking.<p>

After telling Rachel all about her decision to disappear after graduation and start a new life in New York, and carefully avoiding the subject of her first months in NYC, they'd now landed on the present. Quinn had explained how she'd realized how happy she was with working in a flower shop and decided to open her own, and Rachel was questioning her about the meaning and history of every flower she could think of.

"Tell me about the lily."

"For the hundredth time, no! I'm not telling you about the lily!"

"But it's my favorite flower," Rachel pouted. "You can't keep _that _one from me! It can't possibly be as bad as you think it is. Even if it is sexual in nature, I will have you know that I-"

"Please don't finish that sentence," Quinn laughed, fighting the urge to pull Rachel closer or run a hand through her hair. "You don't want to know. Ask me about the azalea."

"I don't want to know about the azalea, I want to know about the lily!"

"Ask me about the azalea."

"What about the azalea?" Rachel said, not even bothering to ban the irritation from her voice.

"It means, may you achieve financial security."

"Quinn! You are taking all of the romance out of flowers, even though it's almost impossible. Now tell me about the lily, for Streisand's sake."

"The lily means," Quinn started, seeing Rachel's apartment building doom up in front of them. "I dare you to love me."

Quinn walked on, to the entrance, chewing the inside of her cheek. _It wasn't a date. It would have the best date, like, ever. But it wasn't a date._

"I had a great time," Quinn said and bit her tongue. _Way to make this feel more like a date._

"Well that's good, I'm glad my company didn't ruin your night."

"No, it was great," she replied. "It was really one of my better birthdays."

"Today is your birthday? I can't believe Finn forgot about that! He should really know, shouldn't he? Perhaps even I should know, or have bothered to ask. Oh, maybe you mentioned it and I just didn't notice it! I should have gotten you something."

_You already got me enough. _"It's fine, Rachel. I mean it, today was a really good day."

"That's good," Rachel said in a small voice. They walked up to the door in silence.

"Well, this is my building," Rachel said cheerfully.

Quinn's heart was racing. Her inner voice had shut up, and her feelings had taken the wheel. Yes, it was a date. Rachel was a great date. And now, she wanted to end the perfect date in the perfect way – with a kiss. And she was sure that Rachel could offer her that. Rachel could offer her a perfect kiss.

And she was going to, because the smaller girl lifted her eyes from the ground and bored her gaze into Quinn's. Quinn wasn't imagining it – Rachel was moving forward, towards her, Rachel was going to kiss her. She was getting closer, and everything felt like slowmotion as her body was getting ready for a gently brushing of her lips against Rachel's.

Until a car honked, and Rachel jumped back.

"Goodnight, Quinn."'

"Goodnight."

Damn it, her mind had taken the wheel back, and she wasn't liking it.

* * *

><p>Rachel waited 24 hours for the almost-not-exactly-but-could-have-been kiss to get out of her mind when she dialed a number in Lima.<p>

"Tina? Hey, it's Rach. I really need to talk to you."

"Hey Rach, what's going on? You sound stressed."

"I'm perfectly fine, thank you. But there was something that I needed to ask you." Without waiting for an answer, Rachel barged on: "Have you ever kissed a girl?"

"No, I haven't. I'd like to kiss a girl before I die, though. Why?"

"It's… for a role."

"For a role?"

"Yes, I'm auditioning for this part about a girl who is struggling with her sexuality."

"Well, if you really want good advice, there's a number I can give you. Do you have pen and paper?"

Five minutes later, Rachel's heart was thumping while she was waiting for god knows who to pick up.

"Santana Lopez, who is this?"

"Santana? It's Rachel, Rachel Berry."

It was silent before she heard a snort. It sounded like a sneeze through the telephone.

"Rachel Berry, what can I do for you?"

"I have to ask you something. It's for a role. I need you to tell me about kissing a girl."

"Are you leaving Hudson for the superior sex?"

"What? No, don't be preposterous! I told you, it's for a role!"

"I was just messing with you, geez, relax. I've only kissed 3 different girls, but I still think I know my shit. They were all 3 different, though."

"Tell me, please," Rachel said in a pleading voice. She hoped it didn't come off as desperately curious as she felt.

"Well, first there's B. But you won't be kissing her. B is an awesome kisser, and she was my first kiss with, y'know, a girl. It was like, really soft and mushy. It really is different from a guy, or for me it was. But that's also because it's B."

"What about the others? I'm not talking about kissing the love of your life. I'm talking about kissing a girl."

"One girl was when me and B broke up, and she was alright. She kissed, like, really hard but still girly. And then there's Quinn."

"You kissed Quinn?" Rachel asked in an awed voice. "Wow. What was that like?" She said, licking her dry lips.

"Actually, great. Quinn was really controlled but she knew what she was doing. Listen, are you done yet? B's calling me."

"Yeah, I… yeah. Say hi to everyone from me."

"Bye, Berry."

Rachel let out a shaky sigh. This, a lot of this just had to do with sexual frustration. What she needed was to release said sexual frustration. She needed to have a good night out with Finn. As soon as possible. Tomorrow.

* * *

><p>"Well, I had a great time," Finn said, trying to break the tension in the small car. "Didn't you? Yeah, I had a really good time."<p>

Rachel didn't answer him, but drummed her fingers on the steering wheel. _There must be something I'm missing. A way to release these frustrations._

"Hey, look," she said, pointing to Central park. "Finn, I have an absolutely crazy idea. I know that this will sound insane, but let's do it anyway. Come on, let's do it in the bushes!"

"What?"

"Let's have sex in Central park!"

"Rachel, no."

But Rachel had an evil smile on her face.

* * *

><p>"Rachel, it's really cold and we have a bed and an apartment. We don't have to hide from your dads anymore!"<p>

She pulled him toward her by his jacket, and a slow smile spread across her face.

"But don't you want me, Finn?" she said softly, before giving him a passionate kiss. His lips were chapped and frozen. Not at all like lips with lipgloss. But she was going to warm them up.

He kissed back, but pulled away after a moment. "Rach, we've got a home. What's wrong with our bed? Wait, what was that?"

"I didn't hear anything."

This time around, Rachel _did _hear the mysterious noise Finn was talking about.

"Whoever is behind that tree, please show yourself, or I will not hesitate to use physical violence!"

"Yeah," Finn added.

She heard the sound of a zipper that was being pulled up, and out stepped Blaine Anderson, waving his hands.

"Blaine?" Rachel said, surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"Same as you, apparently," another familiar voice said. Kurt stepped out with a red, sweaty face and absolutely messed up hair. He had a glowing smile on his face.

Finn had grown silent.

"Well, we weren't actually at that point yet, we were just getting to it. Although I doubt if even that was the case."

"I'm afraid that we snuck out of a party due to lack of…" Kurt gave Blaine a look, and his boyfriend finished his sentence. "Self control."

Rachel giggled, and Kurt gave her a joyous smile.

"Well, control has never been one of Rachel's problems," Finn said, and Rachel's smile melted off her face.

"It was nice running into you," Rachel said to the 2 men across from her. "We should do that again, albeit perhaps at a more appropriate time, under more appropriate circumstances…"

She stepped forward to hug her friend, but Kurt stepped back. "I don't think that you really want to hug me _right now_."

"Oh, right. Well, bye guys!"

"Byebye, I'll give you a call tomorrow!" She heard Kurt yell, while he was already being dragged away from the scene.

* * *

><p>This was getting out of hand. No wait, it had already gotten out of hand. This was definitely <em>not <em>the way Rachel Berry handled things, handled life. And it going to stop today.

She'd tell Quinn that they were better of as friends, and rather not too close.

Rachel felt like she'd diva-stormed all the way up to Lucy's Flowered Up and was high on adrenaline by the time she got there.

Quinn's face broke open with a spectacularly big and white smile, and Rachel stormed past her, into the shop. _I'm about to hurt her feelings. She shouldn't be so happy to see me._

"Quinn, I'd prefer it if you didn't look so happy to see me. What brought me here, is that I don't know what is going on. I have realized that you make me feel something, something that I absolutely cannot feel."

Rachel took a deep breath in a last-ditch effort to control herself.

Quinn's heart was racing, one hopeful thought after the other breeding terrible nests inside her brain.

"I am married! To a wonderful man who has treated me so well for so many years, to someone who I've been with since _high school_! I can't do this to him, and everything about this situation is just spectacularly unfortunate!"

A costumer walked into the shop, completely oblivious to the scene that was playing out in front of him.

"Goodmorning! Could you maybe help me, I was hoping to start a herb garden and…"

Rachel diva-stormed her small body to the back of the shop and Quinn groaned. She picked up the biggest box of herbs she could find and pushed them into the stranger's hand.

"These, these. They're on the house. Now go, please!" She said, pushing him out. She closed the door behind her and tried to control her breathing. _Rachel felt it too._

She walked to the back, where Rachel was already/still talking to either Quinn or herself.

"But there is truly no way, I can't, _can't _do this. I could never actually go through with this." She looked into Quinn's eyes. "So whatever this entails, I can no longer be a part of it. It needs to be put a stop to, and I am doing exactly that right now. I am so, so sorry, Quinn, but it's over."

She diva stormed back out and Quinn leaned her back against a wall.

_It's over_, she thought to herself. _And it didn't even fucking start._

She heard the loud noise of a slamming door, someone was pulling her down, and suddenly lips were on hers, and she felt like she knew them already.

She kissed back fervently, not planning on holding anything back. She pulled Rachel closer while the shorter girl's hands lifted to her face. _God_, she'd had no idea how bad she wanted this.

Her hands took in everything they could while Rachel's tongue was invading her mouth. The smaller girl let out a soft moan and Quinn felt like her brain just exploded. She finally moved her hands to one steady place to rest – Rachel's ass – and squeezed. Rachel moaned again, pushed her body firmly against Quinn and sucked on the blonde's tongue. The blonde immediately pulled her closer, and Rachel, pleased with the reaction she'd gotten, did it again.

Rachel's homebase, for her hands to rest, was Quinn's neck. She was pulling herself closer by it, and it allowed her to run her hands through her hair, something she'd done several times already. She pulled away and laughed, in a little bit of relief and a lot of happiness. This _was _what she wanted. It was exactly what she'd needed.

Her eyes travelled up and down Quinn's disheveled appearance and she blushed when she noticed that the other girl's nipples had hardened and were showing through the shirt. Quinn pulled Rachel closer again and started kissing her neck, while Rachel was in a blissful bubble of so many things she wanted to touch.

Rachel felt her back straining as Quinn pulled her closer. They were sort of awkwardly leaning over each other, and it felt just short of perfect, so she decided to push Quinn down on the table. The girl dragged her along, refusing to break her lips away from Rachel's neck. The dark-haired girl let out a quiet moan when Quinn's thigh made its way between her legs.

The florist dragged her lips up from Rachel's neck – after leaving a mark – up to the side of her face, nuzzling her ear before kissing her way back to the other woman's lips. Rachel sighed into Quinn's mouth and bucked her hips down.

_God, her lips are so soft and her mouth tastes so _sweet_! This is just awesome. I'm making out with Quinn Fabray. This is so, so awesome._

Quinn seemed rather eager, she moved her hands to the strip of skin exposed between Rachel's shirt and her slacks. She didn't hesitate to slide them up higher, and Rachel bit the other girl's lip, making a sound between a purr and a growl.

Rachel felt like she'd lost control over her hands, like they were now just moving up Quinn's body, sliding under her shirt and up her soft stomach. Only now did she notice that she was panting like some kind of ravenous dog, and tried to control her breathing. Quinn slid her hands to Rachel's front, and touched the underside of the smaller girl's breasts. Rachel realized that even breathing was damned.

She lifted her head to look down at the girl she was kissing, and started smiling before laughing.

_How could it ever have seemed difficult? It's so easy._

Quinn looked up at her with the happiest smile Rachel had ever seen her wear, and her heart skipped a beat before racing on.

_I'm so in love with her._

The main door opened and Rachel giggled, pressing her forehead against Quinn's. "Another costumer," Quinn said. "Great."

"Quinn?"

There were only a handful of people in NYC who called her that, and she recognized this voice immediately. Rachel's smile melted of her face.

"Quinn?" Finn asked again. "Are you in there?"

"Y-Yeah. Don't come in!"

She made her way past Rachel, through the door.

"Oh, hey!"

"Hello, Finn," she said, not succeeding completely in hiding her grudge. "What do you want?"

"To buy some flowers, of course."

"Right, of course."

"They're for Rachel," he added unnecessarily. "She's been a little bit… different lately, and I thought, what's better than well-timed flowers, right?"

"You're totally right." Quinn's grudge and chagrin was fading rapidly, to be replaced with guilt. She'd done it again. She'd gone back to high school Quinn. Stealing other people's boyfriends – okay, wife's – and being a total homewrecker. And _again _with Finn and Rachel.

"What does she like?"

"You know what she likes. Lilies."

"Lilies," Quinn sighed, "of course. Easy."

Quinn started busying herself with the flowers as Finn tried to keep his voice light in conversation.

"So how was the game?"

"Oh, it was fun."

"Yeah? How was Rachel?"

"I don't know, fine?" _Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._

"Did she talk about me?"

"No," Quinn said. Her hands started moving faster, trying to get the bouquet done already. Rachel had to be freaking out in there.

"Oh," Finn replied, disappointed. "Nothing?"

"Nothing at all."

"I think I'm not really good at being married and stuff," Finn said abruptly, completely ignoring Quinn's subtle attempts to make him clear that she did not want any conversation. "It's just, I don't know. I wondered if maybe Rachel talked to you, if I'm doing something wrong or whatever, I mean, I know you guys are pretty close."

"We're not that close."

"Well, Rach talks about you, and when she does, it kind of seems like you are."

Quinn swallowed thickly. She felt like she'd had her portion of emotions for the day. The happiness, the shock, the fear, and of course her lingering arousal playing parts.

"She didn't talk to me about you."

"Oh, well. I guess I just have to figure things out." Finn frowned deeply. "I love Rachel, but maybe I should have known getting married to her was going to be complicated. I just wish we could go back to how things were before, when we were just engaged. Things were awesome then. And simple."

"Good luck with that."

"I wish I knew what changed it."

The guilt, right. She'd almost forgotten about the guilt. Another emotion added to the list.

"I'm sure you'll figure it out."

"I have to," Finn said to himself. "I know I can do it."

"Well, this is a good start. Here are your flowers. They're on the house." _Least I can do for wrecking your marriage._

"Thank you, Quinn. You know, you've really changed. I think you're better now."

_Oh come on, is he doing this on purpose or something?_

"Yeah. Good luck with your stuff."

"Bye, Quinn!"

He was barely out of the shop when she raced to the back, only to see an empty room with an open window. Quinn didn't hesitate to climb out of it and she raced around the corner.

Disappearing just around another corner was a flurry of chestnut brown hair, and Quinn began the chase. It lasted all the way to central park.

"Rachel, for fuck's sake, stop walking and talk to me!"

Rachel stopped and turned on her heel, staring Quinn down with an angry but tearful expression.

"What do you expect me to say, Quinn? Weren't you just there? I was lying there and I could hear Finn, hear my husband blaming himself. I promised him, we promised to each other that we would never, ever cheat again after all the drama it brought us in High School. I never imagined I would be the one to break that promise."

"You can put an end to this, you know," Quinn said, trying to keep Rachel's teary eyes locked with hers. She needed every bit of intensity she could get. "You can tell me to go."

"Quinn-"

"Tell me to go and I will," she said, crossing her arms defiantly. "Tell me that's what you want, and I'll disappear from your life and you'll never see me again."

"Is that what you want?" Rachel asked, and Quinn saw every piece of the insecure girl from McKinley High come to life in her expression. _Time to take that insecurity away._

"I want you."

It came out a little more fiercely than she'd wanted it to, but she was thankful that it seemed to get the point across to Rachel.

"Quinn…" Rachel said, stepping closer. She lifted her hand and almost touched Quinn before dropping it.

"I know, alright?" Quinn replied, looking away.

"I can't. I'm flattered, well, more than flattered, but there's not a single way that this could work out well."

"Yes it could!" Quinn yelled, her voice cracking. "You could pick me!"

"I can't," Rachel said. The tears were now flooding her eyes. Quinn was reminded of the fact that they were both rather easy criers, that only Santana and Tina could rival them in that. She decided not to cry right now, though. She'd seen this coming – she didn't even know that there had been any hope at all until this afternoon. Maybe that made things all the worse, though.

She tried to read Rachel's eyes. The other girl wasn't going to say it, wasn't going to send her away. She hadn't really expected Rachel to do that, but now she saw that she'd been unfair. Rachel wouldn't send her away, but she also couldn't pick Quinn. It was Quinn's turn – Quinn's turn to be the bigger person, to stop Rachel's hurt, to make the decision for the both of them.

"We'll be alright."

Rachel sobbed, but Quinn was convinced that this was the right thing. The hardest path was usually the right one. _Growing up sucks. Being responsible sucks. Being the bigger person sucks. Doing the right thing hurts. God, life sucks right now._

"Yeah," she repeated to herself, "we'll be just fine."

Rachel sniffled before another sob came out, and hugged Quinn firmly. Quinn hugged her back and pressed a kiss on top of her head. "Just don't forget about me. About me now."

"I won't remember anything else."

Quinn placed another kiss on Rachel's hair, and one on her forehead before stepping out of Rachel's arms. She smiled and turned around, determined not to look back and not to cry until she got home.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: The final part! There you go! I've rewritten it about a gazillion times but whatever, yeah, I changed the ending. It's still happy though =) I hope you guys like it. On another note, if there's ever anyone who would like to beta or co-write or anything like that with me, I'd really like it. PM me if you do! Enjoy the chapter! Let me know what you think of it!**

* * *

><p>Quinn finished her day at Flowered Up in a daze, but it was a tear-free daze. She <em>wasn't <em>going to cry until she got home, so she avoided going home. She did groceries, practically in slow-motion, until she remembered that she might run into Rachel or Finn and then she decided to hurry instead.

Standing in front of her apartment door, she dropped her groceries at the door and ran away. It didn't take her long to decide that the best plan for tonight was to get drunk, preferably with Edie, who would take care of her. So that was what she did, and she succeeded in keeping the tears at bay.

* * *

><p>Someone else spent that night intoxicated, and it wasn't Rachel. It was her husband. She had a bad feeling in her stomach that was quite easily explained. As if her scene with Quinn in the park hadn't distressed her enough already, now her husband had yet to come home and it was well after midnight.<p>

The only reason she hadn't given him up as missing yet is that Puck had answered his cellphone, sounding reasonably sober, and said that he was with Finn. Finally, at 1:15 AM, Finn came bursting through the doors, sporting a mad grin on his face and talking about losing stress and relieving tensions.

"Rachieeee," he slurred, picking up his wife before stumbling and almost dropping her.

"Finn, put me down."

"I won't let you fall. I won't ever let you down, Rachie."

"Go sober up, please. I need to talk to you."

He put her down. "I can talk."

"I need you to remember this."

"I will, really, I'm not that drunk," he said with a mad grin on his face. Rachel tried to look into his eyes, but his eyes kept dropping.

"Finn, I am starting to get very frustrated right now and I strongly advise you to do as I say and drink at least a gallon of water. I will have you know that I do not stand for this behavior and strongly disapprove, but unfortunately there is nothing I can do now."

"Frustrated?" Finn said, with a wider grin. "Sexually frustrated?"

Rachel walked into the kitchen, inadvertently using herself as bait, because Finn followed his wife into the kitchen.

She poured him a glass of water. "Thanks," he said and gulped it down in one go. Rachel took the glass and filled it again. She repeated this procedure a few times, until she trusted Finn to do it himself.

"I'll be in the living room. Come find me there when you can touch your nose with the tip of your finger while your eyes are closed, because I really do need to talk to you."

Rachel walked out and sat herself down on the couch, crossing her legs and playing with her skirt.

_This is the right thing to do. He's not better off not knowing. He deserves the truth. Even though this almost recalls our high school troubles, he should be aware of what happened and what will never happen again._

She tried to blink the tears away at the thought that it would never happen again.

_Don't cry now. You've cried all day, haven't you? You must be strong. Finn doesn't deserve this. He cannot comfort you this time._

Finn walked in. He still wasn't completely sober, but walked relatively upright. Rachel sighed and stood up. This was the best she was going to get – she needed to get it off her chest _now_ or she'd never have the courage again. She couldn't wipe this under the carpet like nothing had happened, because something _had _happened, and Quinn didn't deserve to be dismissed as a nothing. She was a something, a big something in Rachel's life. But now she was gone.

Finn crashed down on the couch with a moan, his feet sticking out at the end. He gave his wife a dopey smile and waved his hand. "Well, go for it."

Rachel tried to start, but found that she couldn't do it facing him. Perhaps it was weak of her, but she turned around and started pacing. She was so nervous, movement felt like the better option anyway. It at least gave her the illusion of something productive.

"I'm positive you must have noticed, Finn, that things have been a bit different between us as of late. Strained, if you will. And I am afraid that the responsibility of that strain fully lies with me. And even though it's…" her voice trailed off, and she got the distinct feeling that she wasn't Rachel, Mrs. Finn Hudson, but that she was acting out a scene.

Perhaps she was, she'd tried to figure out this conversation all afternoon, it was practically scripted in her mind. Thoughts of Quinn were pounding her head like a jackhammer, giving her a headache, but she talked through it, trying to keep her emotions at bay.

"Though it's over now, you still deserve to know the full and unfortunately ugly truth." She took a deep breath, running the script she'd mentally written through her head one more time.

"I wasn't looking for it, but this just happened to me. I went crazy, I went absolutely crazy for someone else. But please believe me when I say that it is in fact over now, and that I am so sorry. There are truly no words to fully describe how sorry I really am. And know-" she said, turning around. The hardest part was over.

"Know that… Finn? No, no, no, no! Finn!" She took a few large steps to the couch and shook her husband, but his eyes remained closed and his breathing was even.

"Finn, please! You need to hear this, it's incredibly important that you awaken somewhere between now and the next 5 seconds because you need to hear it _now_, and I can only do this once!"

The tears were now leaking from her eyes – where did those bastards come from anyway? Who knew that it were so many? – onto Finn's face. It hurt too much. Not just confessing everything and hurting Finn in the process, but also (and maybe mainly) thinking about Quinn. She couldn't. She really couldn't.

Her face morphed into a pained grimace as she tried to keep the sobs silent, until she trusted her voice again.

"I am staying," she whispered, her chestnut hair falling across her face as she leaned closer to him. "I couldn't, I wouldn't leave you. You have always been enough for me, Finn Hudson. You were the first boy I have ever loved, and you will be enough again."

She pressed a kiss to his forehead and covered him with a blanket. Maybe it was best that he had crashed on the couch, because there seemed to be more tears where these came from and she had an ominous feeling that she'd be crying herself to sleep.

She didn't know that it had been a conscious choice by Finn, which he'd only been able to make because… he still was conscious.

* * *

><p>Quinn had gone out and gotten completely wasted, only to crash at Edie's place, rambling about things that Edie just didn't understand.<p>

"If only I'd realized sooner, if I'd just gotten a fucking grip instead of spending so much time trying to figure myself out, if I'd been a little bit braver, maybe I could have had her in high school. There would have been no fucking Finn Hudson, no fucking Mrs. Finn Hudson and no fucking problem but just a lot of happy!"

She still hadn't cried, keeping her promise to herself: don't cry until you get home.

"Are you comfy, Luce?" Edie asked her, ignoring the rant. The blonde had been ranting all night about _everything _and not bothering to explain _anything_. She'd put some pieces together, though, and Edie had the feeling that if she was right, Quinn was _really _going to need a friend, need _her_.

"God, I would have loved a little more happy. Rachel is happy. She's dramatic, but I think she's also always happy. Bubbly. Positive. I could have used some of that in high school too."

"Who's taking care of your shop tomorrow?"

"I am," Quinn said, for the first time in hours directly addressing Edie.

"You're drunk."

"I'll sober up. Set the alarm clock."

"You really don't want that. You're gonna hate me tomorrow."

"The shop must go on," Quinn said with a goofy giggle. "No, seriously, I really gotta open it. I should. I will."

"Of course you do," Edie said, patting her friend on the back.

* * *

><p><em>Sorry. Couldn't wake you. You'll live. – E<em>

Quinn read the note a couple of times before crumbling it with a groan. _What am I supposed to do now?_

She massaged her temples, trying to get some of the pressure off her head.

_Breakfast. And aspirin._

Quinn felt a little more content, eating breakfast on the couch. She was reading the newspaper, had the radio on and felt overall a little better as long as she didn't think too much. She threw down the newspaper when an overly familiar voice came out of the radio.

"_Thanks, Jeff. It is my first interview."_

"_Oh wow! I'm honored. Are you nervous?"_

"_Not so much," _Rachel said, _"I have been trained for the media ever since I was 4."_

"_That's a long time! Did you always know what you wanted to do? By the way, if any of you good people out there have a question for this rising star, remember you can always call in!"_

"_Yes, I'd love to answer any questions from you," Rachel said, before going on to answer the actual question. "I've always known that this was my dream. There was never another career that I considered."_

"_Amazing, amazing. Your film, Lucky Leia, is doing very well in the theaters right now. There's even some Sundance talk surrounding it."_

"_I've heard that! I cannot tell you how happy I was to hear you. The film deserves this recognition."_

"_How was it to go to your first own movie premiere?"_

"_It was so special, I think I'll remember that night forever."_

"_I heard you went to it with another woman," _the interviewer said, implying a question.

"_I didn't, actually. I had been planning on going with my husband, but he couldn't get out of work. Once there, I happened to run into a friend."_

"_Alright, let's talk about your next movie then."_

"_Yes," _Rachel said, _"I'm very excited about it! I just signed on yesterday."_

"_The title is so far undecided, but I have the summary right here. It's a romantic comedy about 2 women, am I right?"_

"_Absolutely."_

"_How do you feel about playing opposite someone of the same gender?"_

"_Completely normal," _Rachel replied without missing a beat.

"_Really?"_

"_I'm a good actress. Plus, I grew up with 2 dads, so I'm not exactly a stranger to the concept of homosexuality."_

"I don't think so," Quinn called out from the couch at the radio. She listened for a few more seconds before jumping up – adrenaline and maybe a little left over alcohol from last night flowing through her veins – and took her cell phone from her pocket.

"_And we have a caller! Welcome, you're on the show! With whom do we have the pleasure?"_

"It's me."

"_Well, 'me', a little bit more of an introduction might be nice!"_

"My name is Quinn," she said, deciding to use the name Rachel knew her by. "And I'd like to get back to the subject of how Mrs. Hudson is feeling about the same gender."

"_I think we already covered this," _Rachel said in a strange voice.

"Well, I thought maybe you'd like to add something."

"_I'm sure I don't. I'm sorry Jeff, but I think that was all we had time for."_

"_Unfortunately, dear listeners, she's right. Thank you for your time, Mrs. Berry. Lucky Leia is in the theaters now, starring Rachel Berry! Now here's an oldie but a goodie, Happy Together by the Turtles!"_

Quinn put down the phone, realizing she'd been hung up on by a freaking radio program. Her phone immediately started buzzing angrily in her hand, and she picked it up.

"Hello?"

"_How dare you!" _Rachel screeched in her ear. _"After yesterday, this is what you do to me? You know I'm heartbroken. You know I feel awful. And then you pull a stunt like this? Who do you think you are, Quinn Fabray?"_

"_You_ feel awful? I'm so sorry that you can go back to your life, just go back to being with Finn, back to being a happily married housewife. I've got nothing to return to."

"_Happily married? Do you think I'm happy like this? With Finn?"_

"Well, why did you choose him?"

"_You know things aren't that easy, Quinn. They never are."_

"Do you even hear yourself?" Quinn said hotly. "You just admitted that you're not happy with Finn! You're Rachel Berry, the most self-centered person I know, and you're willing to accept this? Maybe you _could _be happy, with me!"

"_You know I've thought about that."_

"Have you? Have you really?" Quinn replied, plopping down on the couch only to stand up again. She knew she was making gestures as she spoke, looking like an idiot. "Because I think you would be happier with me. I could have made you happy. We could have been happy, together."

"_Quinn, it's simply not an option."_

"So you haven't even considered it?"

"_I have, I considered it and came to the conclusion that it wasn't an option to begin with."_

"Oh, you're a great actress but a horrible liar," Quinn said with a mad grin on her face. "I know you're lying right now. I've _really _imagined us together, and I think it would be perfect. Imagine me and you, Rach. Day and night, for the rest of our lives."

"_I have to go now, Quinn. I hope you know you're hurting me right now."_

"I didn't mean to."

"_We would never have worked out."_

"We would have been so happy together," Quinn said in a sad voice.

"_Bye, Quinn."_

Rachel didn't wait for Quinn to say goodbye before hanging up.

After this, Quinn decided that she could use a little bit of distraction. The only thing she could think of was going to work. So she went to work straight from Edie's. Best. Idea. Ever.

* * *

><p>"God, just pick one already!" She said groggily to a woman with 3 equally huge and beautiful bouquets in her arms. "They're all pretty and they're just flowers, alright? Just fucking flowers!"<p>

The woman huffed and left the shop without buying anything. Quinn groaned and laid her head in her hands. If she wasn't going to sell anything, she might as well have stayed at home and spent the day bawling with Ben & Jerry's. Before she could feel the tears welling in her eyes, she straightened her back again. _No crying outside of home._

Quinn was good at pushing through stuff, so eventually the day got a little bit better. Until a familiar face walked in.

There were a number of people that she didn't want to see, but they could all very well be classified under one heading – familiar faces. She didn't want to see _anyone _that she knew. So of course, Puck walked in, sporting an incredibly angry expression.

"Is it you?" He asked, shortly and simply.

Quinn thought about a way out, but found that only blatantly lying would do the trick. Then she contemplated the blatantly lying option, but Puck gave her a look that told her that he already knew. He was just waiting for the last bit of proof. She gave it a last-ditch effort, though.

"What are you talking about?"

His frown deepened, and he suddenly looked older than he'd ever seemed to her.

"You know what I'm talking about, Quinn. Don't fucking lie to me."

Quinn bit her lip and reminded herself to not-cry.

"So it is you," he said, nodding gravely. "I knew it. I just, I knew it."

"I didn't mean for it to happen. Well, _we _didn't mean for it to happen."

"You haven't changed at all, have you? You're still the same Quinn from high school, only now you like girls. But you haven't changed one fucking bit."

She couldn't pretend his words didn't hurt her – they hit her exactly where it hurt the most. In her past, and in the very thing that made the present better; the feeling that she'd made progress and was a better person now.

"How is it going with that promise of yours? Not to be a homewrecker anymore and stuff. Going well? Or was it just all bullshit? Wrecked any homes lately? Like my fucking best friend's?"

He was getting more and more upset now. He'd seemed so put together, but now his high school persona was rearing its head. Quinn kept biting her lip to keep it from trembling.

"He called me, in the middle of the night. She didn't say who it was, but I figured it out. Somewhere, I _knew _you hadn't changed. You were just bullshitting yourself. How does it feel to be back, Quinn?"

"You're wrong," she said in a voice shaking with anger and hurt. "I _have _changed, I am different now."

"I think you're right, I think you're worse now. At first, you at least knew well what you were doing. You really were just a bitch. But now, you put up this all innocent front and its all _fake_!" He said, yelling out the last part. He took a few deep breaths and took control over himself again.

"Maybe you should go do another rediscovery, because this didn't work out real well either. It's bad enough that you just went ahead and ditched everyone, but now you do this? You're the worst part of Glee club, you always were, and you are now more than ever. Stop running, Quinn. The past will always catch up. This is the third time you've had to learn this. You should spare the world some pain, and finally learn your lesson."

He was completely calm when he said it, but she could see in his eyes that he was thinking about _them _– their high school time, their shared history, their child that was walking around somewhere. He walked away without any emotion in his eyes.

Quinn still didn't cry.

* * *

><p>She was fiddling with her keys in front of the door to her apartment, once again searching for reasons not to go in. She knew she was running from the tears, but well, she hadn't been that big on crying, not ever, and she didn't want to cry about Rachel. She'd seen it coming, she'd known Rachel was married from the beginning. She shouldn't have let her in anyway, get this attached, have hope, not when the situation was so completely hopeless.<p>

Suddenly, she knew what she really wanted. What she needed.

She needed to stop running.

Just like that, she took her phone from the pocket and dialed a number that hadn't changed in almost 10 years. It would be a short but expensive call, a call that she'd been avoiding for years.

"Mom? Hey, it's me. I'm coming home."

* * *

><p>It was the middle of December, December 18th to be exact, and it was Rachel's birthday. Her dads had come over from Lima and Rachel was tired, <em>so tired<em>. She hadn't slept at all in days and she was dead on her feet, energy level at zero.

The doorbell rang, and Rachel opened the door to let her fathers in. Hiram handed her a huge bouquet of tiger lilies with a wide smile and hugged her. She was wearing heels and noticed that she was almost exactly as tall as him. Then her daddy came and hugged her so tightly into his chest that she almost couldn't breathe.

"Thank you for the flowers, they are lovely."

"We got them from that shop where I ordered your wedding flowers," Hiram said. And Rachel pursed her lips. _Didn't want to know that._

"Good thing we were just in time," Leroy added, before walking on to shake Finn's hand. "Congratulations, you kept her alive for another year."

"I think my excellent condition plays a part in that as well, daddy. What do you mean just in time?"

"Well, we got them last night already. You don't happen to have a cup of tea for me, do you?"

"Of course," Rachel said and got busy with her 'lady-of-the-house-duties', putting the flowers in a vase and making tea for her dad.

"But why didn't you get them this morning?" She asked from the kitchen, trying not to sound _too _curious.

"Well, we happened to pass it on our way to the hotel. But it's a good thing we didn't wait, 'cause the girl said we were her last order before leaving."

"Leaving?" Rachel said, dropping the vase on the stove.

"Rachel, honey, I know you can be clumsy but it helps when you pay attention to what you're doing."

"Leaving where?"

"Oh, I thought you knew? Well, turns out, it was Quinn Fabray from Lima! I never knew her well of course, and I hadn't recognized her _at all_! But we got talking and she told us she was going to Lima for a while, and maybe travel a little after that."

"Good for her," Leroy added. "Taking a break, everyone should do it once in a while. God, wish I could."

"She's gone?" Rachel said softly. "She's in Lima?"

"Holy shit," Finn said, looking at Rachel wide-eyed. Rachel met his look and saw immediately that he knew. "I have to go."

"No wait, Finn!" Rachel yelled out. This was _exactly _what she had been afraid of. This was the whole point of not telling him who, of _not _making it concrete, but making the most important part that she'd chosen him. He looked as if he'd forgotten all about that now.

"Don't make any rash decisions, please," she pleaded with her husband.

"Shouldn't I have said that to you?"

"I didn't make any rash decisions, I just had my fair share of rash actions. I thought my decision out well enough, Finn. I chose you."

"Honey, what's going on? What choice?" Her dad tried to inquire carefully.

"Jesus, Rach, you don't want this. You're just a coward, you're waiting for me to do it, aren't you?"

"Please, this isn't worth it."

"Do you really want me to do it? Fine, I'll go."

And it seemed like he really was going to do just that. He tied his scarf around his neck and picked up his coat.

"Finn," Rachel said, but stopped protesting.

"Rachel, I just wanted you to be happy, you know that right? And _I _wanted to be the one thing that made you happy. But if I'm not, I can't stand in the way of your happiness."

He put on his coat and gave his wife a lingering look.

"What you're feeling is the unstoppable force, which means that I have to move."

Rachel blinked away her tears as she hugged the man who had become her best friend over the years. He hugged her back and pressed a kiss on her forehead. He walked away, leaving a stunned Hiram and Leroy.

"Daddy, do you happen to have a Kleenex on you?" Rachel asked in a choked voice. Leroy hurried to her side with an old-fashioned handkerchief. She blew her nose and walked into the kitchen to pour herself a glass of water with shaking hands.

"Rachel," Hiram started carefully, "What happened, honey? What was Finn talking about?"

"Quinn… Lucy… well, Quinn. Quinn Fabray."

"From the flowers? What about her?"

"I'm in love with her. I am, I love her."

"You're in love with Quinn Fabray?" Leroy asked in a stunned voice.

"Who tortured you in high school?"

Rachel nodded. "Same one."

"Who is… a girl?"

Rachel nodded again. "I believe you can state that accurately, yes."

"Honey, I think you have to explain to us," Leroy said, putting his arm around his daughter.

"We reconnected at the wedding. I… _we _fell in love. I was married. I chose my husband. And now my best friend slash husband has left me and Quinn is nowhere to be found."

"She's not _nowhere _to be found."

"Practically."

"She's in Lima. She just went home. You can, too."

Rachel looked at her father with tearful eyes.

"Go to Lima?"

"If she's worth it. We can go right now, we'll be there by tonight."

"I'm not sure if that is an exceptionally good idea, daddy. Impulsive actions haven't always given me the best result, and this plan, albeit very romantic, could fail in a number of ways."

"I didn't say it would work for sure, I asked if she was worth it."

"She is," Rachel said without hesitation. "She is worth it."

"Let's go," Leroy said, grabbing her hand and dragging her from her own apartment, barely giving Rachel enough time to grab her coat.

* * *

><p>"Are you sure you're gay?" Her mother asked. She finally released Quinn from her death grip.<p>

"You don't look gay," she added.

"I am," Quinn said, smiling. Judy was blinking away her tears and kissed her daughter on the cheek.

"I'll make you some tea."

"Thanks, mom."

This was exactly what she came for. Home, someone taking care of her, and it felt surprisingly good to be back. She settled on the couch, and a couple of minutes later her mother came in with tea before sitting down next to her – not across from her like she did when Quinn was younger.

"I'm so glad to see you here, Quinnie," Judy said. "Although I'm not sure if I can call you that anymore. You're so beautiful, and so mature!"

"I think there's a clause somewhere that says you can always call me Quinnie."

Judy sniffled and smiled. "Oh God, sorry about this. I'm a mess."

"That's alright."

Judy blew her nose a couple of times and poured some tea into Quinn's cup, before grabbing the sugar pot.

"Not for me, thanks," Quinn said.

Judy smiled at her. "No sugar? So much I'll have to learn."

She handed Quinn the tea and the younger blonde took a sip.

"So, what made you come home now?"

"It felt right, I think I really needed it."

"Why did you need it?"

Quinn knew that Judy knew _something _must have happened before Quinn would go home. She bit her lip.

"Something happened."

"I know," her mother said, confirming her suspicions.

Quinn's hands started shaking and her mother quickly took the tea away from her before hugging her daughter. The sobs were wrecking Quinn's body, and her mother held her tighter in an attempt to still her.

"Shhh," her mother said. "I know."

* * *

><p>On their way to the airport, Rachel was sitting in the back of the car, something she hadn't done since before she got her license. At first, she'd only been excited, but now the nerves were making their appearance. She remembered why she avoided the back seat when she felt herself getting carsick.<p>

"Dad, stop the car. I think I'm getting carsick."

"Rach, honey, you haven't been carsick in almost 10 years."

"I am now, I can feel it. My stomach is all knotted up and I feel like I'm going to throw up."

Leroy gave her a look over his shoulder, and she said: "Please keep your eyes on the road, if you start swaying now, I promise you that I will puke."

"You're not carsick, sweetie. You're just nervous. Take a couple of deep breath. Hiram, talk to her."

Hiram opened his mouth for the first time since they left.

"So, are you officially gay now?"

"I don't know," Rachel said. She wished she had more room so she could pull up her knees to her chest and feel more protected. "I love Quinn."

"What about my grandchildren?"

"Hiram, give her a break! There are ways around that, you know that. That's how Rachie came to be."

"But now… do you still want them?"

"Of course I still want kids. I'm thinking 2 or probably 3. Here's the plan, she'll carry the first, while we look for a donor that resembles me the most and I work on my career. Then later, when my career has kicked in and is well on its way, which should be in about 2 years max, we will switch the process and I will carry the second one. I believe the third should be Quinn's again, because, well, with my career choice you can't afford to get pregnant too often."

"Wonderful," Hiram said, "That's settled then."

"Indeed," Rachel answered her dad.

"I love you two," Leroy said.

On the airport, it wasn't too difficult to get a flight to Lima. People didn't very often go to Ohio, so there was room enough in the next flight to Dayton. It was about 2 hours flying, and according to Rachel, that was wholly unnecessary.

"Did you know that in Japan, they are making airplanes almost as fast as space shuttles? Within a couple of years, we can cross the Atlantic in maybe 5 hours. We'd be in Lima in a heartbeat, an hour tops. The technology is there. Could anyone explain to me why we don't seem to be using it?"

"We're very sorry," Leroy said, dragging his daughter away from the desk.

* * *

><p>"I'm in love, mom," she started. "I mean, I'm really in love. And she's married."<p>

"Married? To another girl?"

"No," Quinn said, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "To Finn Hudson."

"Finn Hudson? _Your_ Finn Hudson?"

"Not my Finn Hudson. He's Rachel's. And Rachel is his."

"You're in love with that Rachel Berry from your old Glee club?" Her mother said in a stunned voice.

"Yeah, yes. That's the one." She picked up her tea again, doing her best to keep her hands still, and took a long sip.

"How did that come about?" Judy asked her daughter with wide eyes, and Quinn laughed.

"Do you want the long version or the short version?"

"Whatever is easier, honey."

"The short version it is."

But as Quinn started talking, she felt like the emotions were pouring out of her body along with the words. She hadn't told anyone the whole story, and it felt so relieving. She didn't need to keep anything in, not about Rachel, Lima, Lucy, being gay, she could finally say everything. Judy barely got about a third of the story through Quinn's sobs, but she got the gist of it.

"I feel like curling up and dying somewhere," Quinn said in a choked voice. Her tears had stopped flowing, but the gallons of slime in the back of her throat had yet to subside.

"You can't think like that. You shouldn't scare your mother by saying things like that."

"Sorry," Quinn muttered and curled up against her mother.

"Does she love you?" Judy asked in a soft voice.

"No," Quinn tried, but her insides immediately identified the word as a lie. She stayed quiet for a few seconds, before saying:

"Yes. But it doesn't matter."

"It's all that matters, Quinnie."

"No it isn't. She's married."

"But she loves you. Trust me. It's all that matters."

Quinn sniffled into her mother's neck, taking in the comfort, feeling the responsibilities seep out of her. With so many day-to-day troubles gone, her mind seemed clearer, almost like someone cleaned it up. But even after organizing her thoughts a little, she found that she couldn't agree with her mother.

"She loves me. But sometimes love isn't enough."

Her mother hugged her tighter to her side, and Quinn sighed.

"Oh honey," Judy said, kissing the blonde hair of her daughter.

"I'm so in love with her," Quinn continued. "I can't... I can't go back. I can't see her, I can't speak to her. I have to get over her. I think I'm going away for a while."

"You already are away."

Quinn shook her head. "She's everywhere. Here too. I see her everywhere I go. This is where we grew up together, do you really think this place won't remind me of her?"

"Sorry, darling. But you are away from her and from your New York life, aren't you? Isn't that enough?"

Quinn shook her head again. "No. I think I'm going far away. Maybe Europe, or Australia. I don't know where I'm going yet, but I think I'm going to take a break from life."

"It's your life," Judy Fabray sighed, trying to keep her own opinions inside of her. She didn't really want to bother her already, not when Quinn had just gotten back.

"Do you wanna go soon?"

"Yes," Quinn whispered. "As soon as possible."

"Why are you here, then?"

"I needed you. I needed my mom."

Judy smiled. "You have no idea how much I loved hearing that."

"But I really should go. Tomorrow."

"So soon?"

"It's really better, mom. I'm not happy in Lima. I'm happy with you, but I'm leaving tomorrow morning. I know you have work, you don't have to drop me off at the airport."

"Quinnie..."

"I'm here for tonight though."

Judy took a deep breath.

"I'm going to visit you in New York when you get back."

"Really?"

"Yes. We're going apartment hunting. I want to be closer to you."

Quinn's mouth dropped, and she looked up at her mother.

"You're leaving Lima?"

"The day you get back to New York."

Quinn crawled back into her mother's side, allowing a few more tears to drop.

"I love you, mom."

"I love you too."

* * *

><p>It was late at night when Rachel and her dads arrived in Lima, and it was almost impossible for her dads to drag her home.<p>

"You don't know where she's staying, it's the middle of the night, Rach, please. You have no idea how to do this."

"Of course I do."

"Rachie, please. Just sleep on it. You're going to make a lot of drama and God knows that that's better in the daylight."

"But the dark adds to the drama!"

"Yes. And if there's anything we don't need, it's more drama."

"Dad! I'm an adult, I can make my own decisions!"

"We'll treat you like an adult again when you start behaving like one."

* * *

><p>It was 6 AM, still dark outside, and the streets of Lima were deserted. The entire town was still asleep.<p>

Well, almost the entire town.

Rachel had awoken her father's half an hour earlier, after not sleeping the entire night. Her energy levels were high, but she was running on pure adrenaline and her reserves.

"Come on, let's go!"

"We can't just go bursting into the Fabray manor at this-"

"Dad, this will happen. I am behaving like an adult, and I have made the mature decision that I can wait no longer. I have to go now."

"Then we're coming with you," Hiram said, kicking his husband out of bed.

* * *

><p>6:00 AM and Quinn was saying goodbye to her mother. 6:01 and she was in her cab. Passing by Rachel's old house, she could swear she saw a Rachel-shaped shadow behind the curtains. Yeah, it was definitely time to go. Now.<p>

"Where to?" The cabbie asked her.

"The airport. Quickly, please."

"You got it," he said, stepping on the gas.

It was 6:30 by the time Leroy pulled into the Fabray driveway. Rachel was out before he'd even put the car in park, ringing the doorbell. At 6:30 in the morning.

Judy opened the door eagerly, but her face dropped when she saw the brunette in the doorway.

"Mrs. Fabray? I'm looking for Quinn."

"You're her, aren't you? I know you are."

"I am," Rachel said confidently.

"She left."

"She what?" Rachel asked, uncomprehendingly.

"She took a cab to the airport about a half hour ago. She's going to Paris."

"I'm too late?" Rachel said in a stunned, heartbroken voice.

Judy got an excited smile on her face.

"Let's go, go, now, hurry!" She said, ushering Rachel away from her doorstep and to her car.

"We took our own car, I'm with my dads."

"We're taking this one, I'm driving," Judy said. "Tell them to get in."

Rachel motioned to Judy's car, and Leroy unbuckled his seatbelt. "I think we should follow her."

* * *

><p>Quinn was there first, mostly thanks to the insane driving skills of her cabbie. She paid him and got out. Her flight was leaving soon; she was headed back to New York to take the flight to Paris from JFK. She barely had any time to kill at the airport.<p>

* * *

><p>Judy was a mad woman behind the steering wheel, her sense of excitement heightening her senses. She raced to the airport in practically no time at all, even though it still seemed to take forever to Rachel.<p>

"Seriously," Leroy said, "I drive totally acceptable and I always get the monologues about dangerous driving and you're not saying anything about this?"

"Emergencies are different," Rachel said, jumping out of the car the second they hit the airport.

The airport suddenly seems surprisingly big and also uncommonly crowded. Rachel chewed on the inside of her cheek. Part of her felt like she'd already lost, like it was already too late.

"Quinn!" She called out, but her voice was hoarse through a veil of tears that seemed to be blocking her throat. She coughed. _This is not the time for your voice to fail you._

"Quinn!" She tried again, but with little success. A man sitting a few feet away from her gave her a short, uninterested look, before picking up his magazine.

Rachel closed her eyes in an attempt to focus. She was awesome at drawing attention to herself. By using her strengths. Her biggest strength was her voice. But her voice wasn't made for screaming, it was made for singing.

Taking a page from Blaine's book, she climbed on the desk of some obscure travelling agency, took a deep breath, and started singing.

"Imagine me and you," she sang, "I do. I think about you day and night, it's only right, to think about the girl you love, so happy together."

This worked, alright. People went quiet and turned to her. Rachel blindly took her phone from her pocket and used speed dial to get to the number she wanted. She held the phone away from her mouth, as not to scare Quinn with the volume of her voice. It already filled the entire hall.

"If I should call you up, invest a dime, and you say you belong to me and easy my mind, imagine how the world could be so very fine… so happy together."

"Get out of my way," she heard Quinn say. Only the blonde top of her head stuck out above the crowd, and Rachel motioned for the crowd to part. They listened as only an audience could listen to a great performer. She still couldn't see Quinn though.

"I can't see me loving nobody but you," Rachel sang with an excited edge to her voice. The blonde head was approaching swiftly and Quinn was down there, just like that, eye-level with Rachel's ankles, singing along.

"When you're with me, baby the skies will be blue, for all my life. So happy together," Rachel sang through her smile. Quinn had taken her hands and was trying to pull her down, but Rachel pulled her up instead. Or at least a little, so Quinn could scramble on top of the desk without too much trouble.

"So happy together," They finished simultaneously. Quinn cradled Rachel's face in her hands like it was a treasure. Every trace of hesitation evaporated from her body as she kissed Rachel fiercely on her lips.


End file.
